The Differences Between Us
by China-kouran
Summary: A Kutoh soldier, is about to get the fight of her life when she meets a Suzaku Warrior.  Secret pasts, unfulfilled destiny, and choice between doing what is easy, and doing what is right! Follows original story of FY, slight AU because of OC's
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: Sadly I don't own F.Y. But I wish I owned Chichiri! Hehe! I do own Kouran and Sutashi, though Kouran is loosely based on a character named 'Kouran' from Chichiri's Graphic Novel. I did a bit of my own stuff, this is not a self insertion fic!

Time frame: Miaka has just returned to the book from her own world. Yui is just becoming the priestess for Seriyuu and everyone is still very much alive. This story of the Mysterious play begins with a single women standing in the mists of a great battle…I am going along with the story line but I am also arranging the order to suit my characters.

I been working on this for 10 years and its finally done. I hope you all like it reviews make me very happy! I just had a friend edit the first chapter so its been up dated a bit.

Looking around my surroundings men were falling to the ground reminding me of leaves in the fall, brightly colored splashes of bright red contrasting with the green of the grass below. Making me think of happier times in my life, when it wasn't about the sheer number of men I killed. One after another they fall before me, wounded or dying, breathing their last breath of air or screaming to be released of their pain. I'm sure at one point in my life I was afraid to kill, now as sad as it seems killing has become second nature. The only way I know how to survive in this cruel world.

While I was born a daughter, I was raised more like a son. Sure, mom dressed me up in dresses and began to teach me to cook but my father started teaching me to use a sword and fight when I was 6. I never understood it, but he told me someday I would; never being one to argue I simply did all I could to master my skills. Now that I look back, a grown woman of 21 years of age, I realize why he taught me what he did; I could not be more grateful for it. I have been in this war for 4 years now slowly becoming a soulless murderer. I fear sometimes there is no goodness left inside of me. The only goodness left is the little fraction of dread and hesitation occurring when I raise my sword to take yet another life. Its times like these that make me wonder how much more of this life I can take.

Commanding a small army, I'll tell you, is no small task for being a woman. In addition, at 21, a woman should be married with a family, me raise a family? What kind of mother would I be? After all I've seen and done. At the age of 15 I saved a women from being attacked in an alley and our soon to be General, Nakago, saw me and told me my fighting skill were extraordinary. He believed I would be a vital asset in the upcoming war. Of course my parents didn't want me to be taken away to be in the military, but what could they do? In this culture, when you were asked by the Genera, l you did what you were told.

I spent my first weeks in the company of the other men at the palace, learning all I could from the others there; some tried to beat me in combat, most failed. Sometimes, you can get away with more, being a woman; guys tend to let their guard down for a pretty face. Not that I am beautiful or anything. I have long hair down to my waist, its light blue with shades of lavender, and it's always too much of a burden for me to handle, as other woman do. It's so long that it cannot be bundled up underneath my helmet, thus I resort to looping it up in pigtail buns. At the very least it keeps it from falling on my face. My eyes are pale blue, people tell me they look just like the sky, 'Innocent looking' they'd say. I am anything but innocent. By the time I was 17, I had fought more men than I had talked to, and I killed a fair amount as well. I tell myself, "I did it to survive, to save my country," as if to give me an excuse for killing, but in my heart, I know I'm just a cold hearted murderer. It's something I just say in order to keep my sanity, not to mention also to humor Nakago.

None the less, I became the only female warrior in the entire army. Though my skills excelled, I can't say that I was enjoying my time in the company of armed perverts. Then to my delight, after a year of attention only a prostitute would enjoy, I heard of another warrior who thankfully was a women, apparently she would challenge men to fights for free sake. So I went to meet her and after little convincing I bought her to be second in command for my small army of about 50 or so men.

'Sutashi' was her name, but we quickly became friends and I had the honor of knowing her as 'Suta'. Suta never really talked about her past, even when I found her she didn't say much of how she learned her skills, only that she once had a Master, who this person was I had no idea, all I know is the girl could definitely fight, and words could not express my gratitude in having a companion to suffer the ongoing harassment of the other soldiers.

We quickly became a pair not to be crossed with on the fields of war. With my skills and Sutashi's lust for fighting, not a soul would dare to challenge us. Where I would have mercy, Sutashi wouldn't hesitate to kill. Perhaps that was another thing that brought on extra attention to her. Strength and skills aside, she was a beautiful woman. Her wild and untamed dark blue hair that spiraled down to her shoulders and her eyes an earthly shade of green encircling yellow rings around her pupils. Men were easily fooled by her pretty face, and thought she had an excellent sense of humor. I think most of her humor came from the fact that she was constantly sneaking into our supply of sake.

But now is not the time for reminiscing, one could easily die here if caught off guard, and I am every one's target.

"The chores of being a girl." I sighed out loud with a grin.

I fought my way through the siege of soldiers coming at me. Sadly, they never had a prayer. They fought bravely, but faster than they could comprehend; we had them running. The army of our arch enemy, Konan, was now in full retreat. I was covered in their blood once more. The funny thing about blood is that it is something you can never wash off, no matter how hard you try. It leaves a permanent stain somewhere beneath the skin that just never seems to go away. I can't help but think the people that I kill have families waiting for them to come home. It's my duty to my country and a way to protect those I love, but in doing so the price I pay is I. As a result, killing has become all that I know and all that I am, consuming both my past and my future with its wretchedness.

Sutashi slammed her hand on my back and broke me from my thoughts.

"Kouran, isn't it great? We won! Look at those dogs run with their tails between their legs!" she laughed with pride. I continued to stare at the bleeding men lying before my feet. Only minutes ago they had homes to go to, families waiting for them. Now they were nothing but fertilizer for the grass, and angry ghosts roaming the nether realms.

"I 'm covered in blood," stating the obvious, I was getting tired of these endless battles. "Why don't we wash off in that pond we passed earlier - I'm not in the mood for peeping toms," I said, slapping her back just as hard as she had hit mine. Men are such ridiculous perverts, and I was in no mood to deal with them, as usual. All I could think about was the battles yet to come, there would be more even bloodshed ahead. I am so sick of blood, I feel like I am drowning in it. I really shouldn't have any emotions while fighting; they only get in the way of distracting you from defending yourself. It's so hard to stop thinking and just slash the person apart and walk away like it was all in a day's work. And there is blood, there's always so much blood…

"Hey, you ok?" Sutashi snapped me back from my thoughts once again.

"Yeah, I am fine," I mumbled, removing my clothes and getting into the water. As we bathed in the cool waters, the blood ran off our skin and hair, turning the water a shade of murderous red. "Don't you ever get sick of this?" I asked in search of understanding.

"Eh," she shrugged, "sometimes, but only because of the all the wasted lives, but I do like to kick some ass!" she boasted. "We are warriors defending our country and honor right? But above all, we get free Sake! That's always an extra bonus!" She spoke humorously and splashed around in the water.

"Kouran, come on. Let's get out, the water is freezing!" She glared at me with a sigh, "Man, you sure are out of it tonight. Let's go back and try to get some sleep."

"Yeah, I think I need sleep," I said, my thoughts once again drifting. What's wrong with me? I let my thoughts drift in the middle of a battle today! That could have been fatal! And now I'm zoning out while Sutashi's talking to me. Perhaps some sleep will do me well, I reassured myself, as we wondered through the woods back to our campsite full of low lives. I went to bed and tossed and turned or hours until finally I fell asleep that was, thankfully, dreamless for once.

Shortly after the sun had risen, we received word the Celestial Warriors of Suzaku were coming. They were the most powerful warriors that our southern enemies in Konan possessed. The four countries that make up our world are each governed by a single God. We, the followers of Seiryuu, serve the Great Dragon. We are forever battling with our enemies in the southern country of Konan. They serve the Red Phoenix, who is ever burning red with fire, a symbol of rebirth. Then there is Genbu, the guardian of the North, who resides deep within the Mountains of Hokkan. Genbu is a blackened serpent tortoise; he represents the element of earth. Byakko, the white tiger, is the guardian of the West Country Sairou. The greatest of metals are known to come from there; they are also known to have the best swords and weapons out of all four countries.

First thing in the morning, Sutashi and I were ordered to clear out a small enemy camp not more than 8 miles away. With the assistance of 20 of our men we ventured out onto the battle grounds and eased our way through hidden paths that only we knew. After only three hours our mighty little army of men were reduced to nothing more than whining scum. Sutashi and I were on the verge of killing them ourselves after the agonizing hour and a half of "Are we there yet?", "I'm hungry", "How do crabs have sex?", and" Hey nice ass!" How do crabs have sex?

"Ok, are guys really supposed to complain like this? Do they ever shut up?" I asked, completely fed up with our men and their crabs. They were supposed to be warriors. Yet they were pissing and moaning like teething babies.

"I haven't a clue, but if they don't shut up I think I might seriously hurt them," Sutashi replied with great annoyance. I could tell by her voice that she was getting very aggravated…no…aggravated doesn't cut it. More like pissed off. Pissing off Sutashi was not a smart thing for any man or anyone, for that matter, to do.

"Let's lose them. We could head off into the woods, saying we have to go pee or something", I said, starting to get excited about the idea of actually escaping these pathetic soldiers and their pathetic pick up lines for at least a few minutes.

"Do you even have to ask?" she exclaimed, with a ray of new hope shining in her eyes.

"Hey Kenai," I called out," We're going to go in the woods and don't any of you dare try to follow us!" Kenai was our usual second in command when we had other things to do.

"I bet they have to piss again," grumbled a man who was rolling his eyes.

"Those two are always stopping for one thing or another," said another man scratching himself.

"Hey, watch it!" I warned. "You've been crying for your mothers for the past three hours! I believe I have the right to not soil my armor and smell like your foul asses!"

Sutashi and I quickly ran off into the woods until we found ourselves in a small clearing.

"We're finally free of those idiots!" I said with a smile.

"I know. Men! Who needs them?" Sutashi added. We were quickly silenced by the nearing sound of voices. Two men were heading in our direction.

"Chichiri, I thought you said this way would be faster! It's taken 3 whole days! I don't want to walk anymore." A fiery red headed man complained.

"Tasuki, get up! You tell me you want to fight in this battle and then you complain the whole trip! I am tired to, but you only think about yourself. You are so lazy." yelled Chichiri, shaking his tired little friend. Guessing by his appearance, I'd say he was some sort of monk. His hair was spiky and blue with a straw hat strapped to his back. In his right hand he carried a monk staff, but other than that seemed completely unarmed. All that Tasuki had was a fan... strange.

"I am sorry Chichiri, but I am so tired! I'm in great need of sake at this point" Tasuki whined.

"What am I going to do with you? Get up! We're on the verge of a great battle, no da!" the monk urged. He was trying desperately to drag Tasuki onward but stopped suddenly. I wondered if these were the warriors of Suzaku we had been forewarned about. In a hushed tone I crouched down closer to Sutashi's ear and whispered, "I believe they may be the warriors of Suzaku!"

"No way, those guys don't look very strong. Look at the weapons! A staff and a fan! Ooooh, scary," She mocked in response to my suggestion.

"Yeah, look at the weapons Sutashi. They wouldn't do much damage unless you had power like the kind certain _Celestial Warriors_ have. Do you get what I am saying?" I replied.

"Oh. Yeah," She nodded her head stupidly.

"Let's get them now while they're not suspecting anything," I prepared myself for battle.

We leaped out from behind the trees. I held my sword above my head, with every intention of slamming it down on Chichiri's head. With swift gestures he jerked his head towards us and mumbled some spell I could not understand. Before I could get within 2 feet of him an unseen force threw both me and Suta flying back to the trees. We sat there dumbstruck, clueless as to what we should do next. The monk and his companion approached us. Chichiri just stared, and his fiery friend gave us a wicked grin. We should have known better than to attack our enemy not knowing what they were capable of doing. We were _way _out of our league here, as neither of us was currently in any possession of such great power.

"What are two little girls doing playing with swords in the woods?" Tasuki mocked us.

"What the hell was that?" Sutashi screamed at Tasuki. "You should be crumbled in the grass like the lousy turds you are!"

"You kill me? I think not, you crazy Bitch!" Tasuki screamed back with the exact same intensity as hers. This was ridiculous.

"This is all you're doing." I glared at the smiling monk. For the first time I studied his face, and noticed that it wasn't his face that was smiling, but a mask. I could not help but wonder what he was trying to conceal by wearing such a thing.

"We are warriors of Suzaku, you really should be more careful when you attack strangers in the woods, no da?" he answered quietly. He kept staring at me through that smiling mask of his. What the hell was that about?

Trying once again to get close to the monk and his friend I was bounced off as if by an invisible wall.

"What's going on?" I stated, confused and holding my hand out as if I could touch the wall. This was not covered in training. I could not believe this; I really don't think there was any sort of protocol or procedure for not being able to smite my enemy. I looked at Sutashi, who had already plopped down in front of the man she had previously been trying to murder. She pulled out a bottle of Sake which she always seemed to find ways to stash in her armor and dangled the bottle in his face grinning maliciously at him. He was obviously jealous of her chugging down the bottle of fluids he'd been craving, but really none of this was getting anything accomplished.

"You're drinking at a time like this? What in the name of Seiryuu is wrong with you?" I screamed, thinking this had to be some sort of bad dream or something.

"What? It calms me down!" She said stubbornly.

"Oh, I'll calm you down! What in the world are you thinking? We're standing before two Suzaku warriors we're apparently unable to attack, AND YOU'RE SITTING THERE DRINKING?"

"Well, what do you want me to do? I seem to be incapable of murdering anyone at the moment," the only excuse she could offer for her pitiful alcoholic behavior. "Someone else can go kill their self-centered greedy-"

"What do you mean by self-centered and greedy?" Chichiri quickly interrupted, "Our country has been feeding your country, clothing your people, building homes, offering to send our own troops to help your country. But your emperor has been selfishly keeping all our charity for himself instead of giving it to his people. You are the self-centered greedy ones, no da?"

"Why the hell would I believe such blasphemy?" I challenged, glaring them down with the look of malice that I had learned so well from Suta. I was not about to believe that I had been destroying lives and slaughtering strangers for so many years for nothing. Granted that the Emperor was a crazed sex fiend, surrounded by concubines, I refused to believe he was even less of a man than I had thought him to be.

"Your Emperor is a selfish man! No da," Chichiri exclaimed, Then added, "I can prove it all if you like, no da?"

" Riiight," I rolled my eyes in disbelief. "Chichiri, is it?"

"Yes"

"If you can prove the things you say are true," I thought for moment, "I will join you in your fight to defend your country."

"What! What the hell are _you_ thinking, Kouran!" Sutashi's eyes looked as though they would pop out of their sockets. "Here we are standing before two Suzaku warriors on the eve of one of the largest battles of the war, and YOU'RE MAKING DEALS WITH THE ENEMY?"

I rolled my eyes, she may be a drunk, but she had a point. This may be an act of betrayal, but something in me was curious to know that I was fighting for a real cause.

Chichiri flinched as though he were suddenly stunned. I heard him mumble something under his breath, but he made no effort to explain why. My attention went back to focus on Sutashi, who was fuming with anger. Too bad we already ate breakfast; I could have fried an egg on her head by the look of it.

"What have we got to lose? We know our emperor wouldn't do that to his people," I said, hoping she would understand. She gave me a reluctant nod that told me she understood.

"It's agreed then, let's head to Emperors palace in Kutou and I'll show you all the proof you need." Chichiri confidently instructed.

"How do we know you won't try to attack the palace once inside?" I asked suspiciously.

"You have my word as a monk and a warrior; we will not attack the palace." He assured me.

"Alright," I don't know why the hell I trusted him; my instincts told me there was nothing to fear. Sutashi didn't seem quite as confident, but that didn't matter. I was the one dealing the cards here.

"How in the name of Seiryuu are we supposed to get all the way to the palace and back before the battle?" Suta charged them, trying to figure out what else these two were capable of.

"Like this, no da" Chichiri took off the mantle he wore over his shoulder and set it on the ground. 'What the hell is he doing' I thought as I looked at him stupidly, 'Damn I hope this doesn't blow up in my face.'

"And that's going to do…what?" Sutashi said, asking the million dollar question. She looked as confused as I was.

"It will transport us into the palace." He said in a cheery voice, "Come Stand on it you'll see, no da." As instructed, we reluctantly stood on his robe. It was as if we'd only blinked and opened our eyes to see that we were standing in the Emperor's throne room.

"Neat trick," Sutashi whispered with true astonishment, "You even hide us out of view! Hey can you get us into the royal brewery? I need to restock." she giggled excitedly. Still shocked by my own surroundings, a group of old men in rich silk robes walked into the room. Leading the group was the man I recognized to be one of the council members, by the way he was so richly dressed, I assumed he was the one in charge of our countries funds… call it a hunch.

"Your Greatness," the richly robed council member spoke. There was a hint of fear in his voice as he continued," I regret to inform you that our funds are becoming more and more limited with this war. The people are starting to flee; there is a lack of food-"

"You dare come to interrupt my day with such petty issues!" My Emperor spat back at him. "The people's problems are not my own, and I will not stand to hear such ridiculous complaints! If they are so unhappy with what I have given them then shut them up, permanently! The way we always deal with weak complainers. Leave! And bother me no more with your stupidity; I have more pressing matters to deal with." The man had become pale, his face saddened. He turned away and left more distressed then when he came. I felt bad for the poor sucker. "Hong Lei, come forth," the emperor called, there was a sick grin on his face, "round up some of the village women, dress them appropriately and deliver them to our troops. I want our warriors well taken care of."

"Yes, your Excellency." his loyal servant bowed and was about to leave when the Emperor said, "Hong Lie" and the servant immediately halted, "make sure they're young and well endowed." The emperor laughed horribly.

My blood began to boil. My hands in fists from terrible rage, all I could think of was the hundreds of ways in which I would like to see those two die. Sutashi was beyond the point of just thinking of the ways, as if instinctively I knew what she was about to do. In a matter of seconds Suta unsheathed her sword and went to charge after the emperor and his servant. However, I was ready, and yanked her back into our little hiding place. To think! Of all the men I could have stopped her from killing, I choose those two! Men like them are not worthy of air! They do not deserve to live! And how many lives had I destroyed for them without any just cause except to feed their sick, malicious desires. Everything I fought and stood for is now gone. Everything I've done for my country and loved ones was in vane!

"That will do, Chichiri." I choked, my head down in shame with all that I have realized in this moment, "You win, from this moment on my loyalty lies with Konan."

Still shaking with the rage boiling within her, Suta picked her moment when I was not paying attention enough to hold her back.

"I will not leave until I have his blood on my sword!" she roared and with one last drastic attempt, she leaped up and charged straight for the bastard emperors' throat. Tasuki and I caught her within 15 feet of the thrown, silent and deadly as she was; no one else seemed to have noticed. Thank Seiryuu! Chichiri quickly sprawled out his cloak and just as before, we instantly found ourselves right where we had met.

It's funny how life surprises us all with its changes. One moment I was fighting for my country, killing because I was asked to, doing this all in the name of the Emperor, to save those I loved. The next moment my word and all I stood for had crumbled to my feet; I have become a traitor. We all just sat there silently taking in the truths that we had just over heard when a dreadful sound reached our ears. Our men were coming for us.

"Damn! Where the hell do those two bitches go? What kind of Army puts bitches in charge of 50 men anyway?" one man complained.

"Those whores need a good lesson and I think it's time we gave one to them" replied another, whose life I quickly decided was going to end in the near future.

"HAH! With those two hell cats? You'll need more men to hold them down! You underestimate their strength!" said the third man, in his attempt to be rational.

"Well count me in! I haven't gotten laid in ages! Those bitches have it coming to them!" cheered the first man.

"Me too! Serves them right! They should know better, an army is no place for a woman to be, unless she's there for horizontal refreshment!" said the soon to be dead second.

"This ought to be good" said the third, now licking his lips. They turned back towards camp to spread the word. How dare they! I thought it was bad enough when I saw the Emperor give the orders to have innocent women raped and battered by these idiots. It sounded even worse when we were the target. I felt sick to my stomach, and pissed beyond all hatred.

"I think I've heard enough for today," I spoke out loud as if without a soul. I looked at Suta, and with a happy grin she knew without words what I told her to do. Those men were dead where they stood. She walked off in their direction, grinning maliciously from ear to ear. I didn't need to see her to know what happened to those three men. All you could hear was the quick swish of a blade and the screams that followed, which were quickly silenced. It would have been a haunting sound had I not been so happy to hear it.

Suta quickly returned within minutes. Her armor streaked with red, wiping her face as if she was just relieved of a heavy burden.

"What do you believe in now Kouran?" Sutashi asked me as if I had just committed some horrible act of blasphemy. It wasn't my fault that I believed in my country and did what I was commanded to do; I did what any soldier would do. What was done, though wrong as it may have been, was done; irreversible as my previous actions may have been.

"I don't know right now." I sighed miserably. This was a lot to swallow in one day, our emperor lied to us and we killed in his name for nothing. Such a terrible waste! I felt like vomiting, except for the fact that there was nothing in my stomach to swallow. Food was getting tight in our country; no doubt it was due to the emperor. THAT FAT BASTARD!

It killed me to think that one day my destiny would catch up with me, and I'd have to return to him once more. But at least with this final act before that time comes, I might make amends for all the wrong I've done. I now had an oath to fulfill.

"A deal is a deal, you will have my sword." I spoke as a woman of her word, though somehow I knew that this would not end happily. "But before we go, I'd like to speak to my family, they live close by. They'd be more than glad to put us up for the night." No one had any complaints, especially Tasuki, who was still complaining about his aching feet. Without argument, we started the journey to my humble home. I remembered it in my heart through all the hard times I had endured during the constant training and wars. I hadn't seen it since I left. 'Will they recognize me?' I wondered anxiously. I couldn't wait to see those loving faces that were once more familiar to me.

It was nightfall by the time we reached the house of my childhood. I stood before it, taking in every moment and consuming its entire simple splendor. Yet, something was amiss. It didn't feel right for some reason. I looked at the others to see if maybe they could sense it too. Trying my best not to change my composure, I tried to think of pleasant things. I had been looking forward to this moment all night. Now here I was, and it isn't how I pictured it. I pushed myself to shake these feeling off, but the feeling of dread was almost overwhelming. Taking a deep breath as I approached the front door, I reached for the handle and gently shoved it open.

I smelled it the instant I walked into the door. Death was in my home, it dominated the rooms of the house. Panic swelled within me as I tried to make sense of it all.

"MOM? DAD?" my voice cracked with concern as I called out for my parents. I stumbled through the house towards their room. The house looked untouched, but that smell! That god-awful aroma was everywhere. Why?

The others were following cautiously behind me, on full alert for anything that might jump out from the dark deadness in my childhood home. The feeling of death was growing stronger with every step I took towards my parent's room. Dread, panic, horror, like I'd never known were fighting for control over my nerves. They won. I gave in and darted the last few feet to the door and yanked it open.

The overpowering odors of blood cause me to gag. I stared at the room. The bed was blanketed with blood which had at some point even spilled on the floor. Those cowards! whoever they were! They never gave my parents a chance to defend themselves! The killers murdered them while they slept. Perhaps this way they may have, at least, went without pain and suffering.

The others were as silent as my parents; their heads hung low in sorrow for me. Tears began to pour from my pale eyes; I never thought it would be like this. Why would someone do this? It must be because of me. Yes, it's my fault; I wasn't here to protect them. If I had been like any other girl, I'd be in their warm embraces right now. I gave a pitiful look to Suta, having such a bond like ours; she instantly knew its meaning.

"I'll help you." she said quietly, and walked out of the room mumbling something that sounded like, "It stinks in here anyways."

The others followed her out, and left me alone to mourn as they prepared two empty graves. I walked to my mother's side, like my father's, her face was pale and her eyes were closed. They have only been dead for a few short hours which made me believe they already knew of my betrayal, news spreads quickly when the army is involved and spies could be everywhere.

"I'm so sorry! I was too late to save you". My knees gave out and I fell before my mother's side and cried more than I have ever cried in my life. I must have cried myself to sleep; when I woke my hands were holding the blood stained sheets. Chichiri was standing a safe distance behind me, but I could sense him there.

He came beside me and said "We need to get out of here, they might come back." I knew he was right I told the others to leave I would be down in a minute. I needed to say goodbye. They respected me and told me they would wait outside. I gently went up to my mother and removed her necklace that has been in the family for generations, I placed it around my neck. I kissed her on the forehead as I did to my father and I vowed to fight for good. "I will never be taken advantage of again. I will save Kutoh! I love you; I hope someday you will be proud of me." I said, tears of pain filling my eyes and my words as Chichiri assisted me in wrapping them up in sheets. We first raised my mother's body, and carefully carried her to the two graves that were freshly prepared for her and my father. I never thought I'd have to bury them like this. I thought I'd at least get to embrace them both just one last time. How unfair that I should be robbed of them like this. As we walked out the front door and headed onwards to the grave site, Suta and Tasuki soberly walked in and picked up my father and joined us as we laid my parents in their graves. Chichiri prayed over them as we covered them with dirt and stones.

The others looked almost as miserable as I did.

"We need to burn the house." I said with great melancholy, "I want no one robbing it".

"I'll do it," Tasuky quickly volunteered, "Watch this!" He said, preparing to impress us all with another trick. "Rekka Shinnn!" He yelled as threw the steel fan back and a burst of flames engulfed my home. Chichiri again uttered prayers over the burning home I once knew so well. I felt overwhelming gratitude to him for that. So much had occurred in so little time. I lost my country, I lost my reasons, and worst of all, I lost my parents. With obvious reason, no matter how hard I tried I couldn't hold back my suffering. I lost my balance and toppled over in tears of mourning. Knowing the fires would draw attention, Suta tried to convince me to get up and leave. I knew it would be wise, but I could not go, not yet. I wanted to stay close to the one true thing; I had left in this world which was now crumbling to the ground with everything else in my life. Finally as the fires roared upwards and stretched its hot flames into the stars, Chichiri finally picked me up and threw me over his shoulder. Punching and kicking, struggling to stay near my burning home, he carried me away. The others solemnly followed beside us.

It was not till we were a safe distance away, with the fires long out of sight, I felt drained of all my strength.

"I'll never fight for Kutoh again," I vowed, knowing such an idea was not possible. More empty promises from an empty girl. I just wish that it were only true. The ugly truth is, some day they will come for me. They will hunt me down, destroying all they come across to find me and drag me back to the land I have now betrayed.

"We can head back to Konan right away. The journey will take about 4 days, which will give you time to rest yourself spiritually, no da" said Chichiri.

"Thank you," I was truly grateful for his patience and understanding. I felt like I could relax for once, and breathe freely without worry-a feeling I'm sure would not last long. But I seldom get a moment's peace to just sit and reflect. "I need to get myself cleaned up, I know a place not far from here, if you'll excuse me, I'll be right back."

No one argued, after all the hell I just went through, how could they? I walked to where I once spent time with my father as a young girl. We'd go fishing and swimming in this very pond every day. The very thought of my father weighed heavily on my mind, this was a hurt that would linger for many days to come. Staring into the calm waters, I just wanted to cleanse myself of this horrible day as was my usual preference after being covered in blood. Quickly I undressed and slipped into the crystal waters, letting the soothing water wash the blood and tears away. I finally let myself relax and swim around freely, without concern. Without warning I felt a chill roll up my spine. Instantly I whipped around to face the person who had the nerve to invade my privacy. For a moment I saw nothing, but a ridiculous laughter filled the air. I'd know that stupid laugh anywhere, Tomo.

"Why, if it isn't little Kouran, all alone and naked. Looks like you found your parents a bit too late!" he said joyously. Tomo was one of the seven Celestial Warriors of Seiryuu. He was famous for his use of black magic and deceiving weak minded men into madness with his illusions. I had met him only once before. He would always tell me that I would one day join him and the warriors and realize my true power, but there's no way I'm joining them, not now, not today of all days. I glared at him as he continued, "Don't worry little Kouran, I made sure you're parents paid the price for your betrayal! Must run in the family eh?"

"Talk ill of my parents and naked or clothed your dead where you stand!" I meant it too, though my armor and weapons were out of reach on the shore. That freakish bastard killed my parents! The rage in me surged through my soul, gnawing away all rational thought and sanity. It was then that my true power revealed itself to him as I was suddenly engulfed in a turquoise light. The tail symbol appeared on my right thigh.

"So it's true you share your brother's power!" Tomo cackled out loud with delight. "It doesn't matter what your betrayal is! If your brother dies you have no choice but to fight for Seiryuu!"

I continued to fume with rage. But before I could leap at him and rip him to shreds with my bare hands, he vanished before my eyes. Damn it all! I've betrayed my country, and now myself! The rage turned to helpless frustration and misery as the light faded. There was nothing I could do now, the emperor will know what I am soon and there is no way that I can avenge my parents without severely pissing off Seiryuu himself...This just had to happen now, didn't it! Damn the Gods! What the hell did I do to deserve this day, oh yes, I'm a murderous traitor that must be it.

Having had my one moment of undeserved peace and privacy completely destroyed, I waded through the waters to the shore. Quickly, I dressed myself and rejoined the others as if nothing had ever occurred. Even Suta, my only friend, had no idea that I was hiding such a hideous secret. Should my brother die before me, his powers would transfer unto me; I too would become a Celestial Warrior. I would be obligated to fight for the country I had just condemned. Even now, the power has made its mark upon me. Every time I've felt the rage in me over come all sense of rationality and every time I had no way out, my brother's power would take over and come to my aid. This was what my father had been training me for all the time I had shared with him.

Having been drained of any further desire to consciously breathe air, I took the path I often found Sutashi on when all else had gone wrong- drinking myself to oblivion. Plopping myself down on the ground next to her, I dug through our things until I found the bottle that would relieve me of my sorrows. In a desperate attempt to drown myself in it, I gagged on the over powering taste of alcohol. In moments the numbing sensation and the buzzing in my head erased all consciousness of my miserable situation. By the time Suta tried to stop me, I was far away in a drunken stupor.

"I think you've had enough Kouran," Suta chuckled at me as I could no longer keep my balance while sitting. With great difficulty, she wrestled the bottle from my hands.

"We have a long ways to go tomorrow, no da?" Chichiri thoughtfully reminded me, "You're not going to be feeling too well in the morning."

"ShhhShhsshh," I slurred stupidly, "Teh nite is yung." Good God, I was drunk.

"Are you sure you're alright Kouran?" Chichiri continued with concern in his tone. Tasuki and Suta were far too busy pointing and laughing at me as they shared a couple drinks themselves.

"Meee? I am grrret!" I slurred as I winked and tried to give him a thumbs up. Strangely it was a lot harder than it should have been. I laughed it off and fell over onto the soft grass. Somehow I don't think I felt a thing.

"Just how many of those have you had?" he continued, unsure he wanted to hear the true answer.

"Heheh, uuh…. Dunno" I really wasn't sure, nor did I really care. All that mattered was the blissful drunken numbness that had sweetly relieved me of the pain in my chest for the night.

"Yeah, it's probably time we cut you off. If you keep this up we won't have any left for the rest of the trip!" Tasuki roared as he looked at the empty canisters. Amused as he was by my stupidity, he was serious about his sake.

"U Liv me 'lone, .. u .. red hed!" I hissed back at him, that'll teach him. I pushed myself up and tried to stand and stomp my feet at him. Unfortunately, it didn't work out how I wanted either. By the time I managed to stand up and tried to stomp my foot, I tripped over myself and toppled over. The others went into hysterical laughter, whether Chichiri was laughing or not, I couldn't tell, but he was the only one assisting me. He helped me over to a tree next to our camp fire and leaned me up against it, safely sitting down.

"Gt 'way frem me!" I yelled and shoved him away; after all he'd done for me. He quietly sat down by the fire next to me. I must have been a pitiful sight to see so drunk and have to have someone take care of me. Much worse we were warriors, and I realized how embarrassing this was for me. I broke down and behaved so childishly in front of strangers. Sobering up, I sat and stared at the fire for some time, reliving my nightmare of watching my family home go up in smoke, and my beloved parents being buried. The weight in my chest returned and overflowed my head with tears of remorse. Without truly realizing it, hot tears streamed down my face as I glared at the hateful fire.

"Some warrior I turned out to be!" I sobbed and lightly slurred out loud, "I've abandoned my country, 'n neglected my parents… It's all my fault! Had I ben there I could hve saved thm!"

"Getting drunk won't make anything better for you," Chichiri returned his gaze to my display of wretched and pathetic weakness.

"What the hell would you know about it? You don't know what it's like to lose everything you had and stood for!" I screamed, not caring if I woke up the others who had now comfortably passed out on the grass, sake in hand. How dare he tell me what the hell would make any of this better! "You don't know a damn thing about it!" I raged on. Then he did something I didn't expect. He did not yell or try to take a swing at me; instead he then removed the smiling mask he wore. He revealed the scar lacing over his left eye that he'd never see through again. I couldn't help but stare at him dumb founded by his actions, and his admirably handsome face, even with the scar. The look in his eye and the expression on his face held an expression of deep remorse and inner pain.

"I was once engaged to the most beautiful woman, I had ever known. I loved her more than life. Her name was the same as yours…" he paused for a moment, as he relived his story while allowing me to hear, "those were happy times for everyone. I spent a lot of time hanging out with my best friend Hiko, we did everything together. Then one day I saw him kissing my beautiful bride to be. I was filled with jealousy and hatred. I thought, 'how could they betray me like that?' I could not stand it after I had caught them she left me she said she was not pure because she had kissed another. I thought he had taken her from me forever. That night in the pouring rain, I went after him. Great floods were coming but all I could think about was revenge. Hiko and I fought until he went over the edge of the riverbank that were standing on, I grabbed him and held on with all I could, but a log from a tree came and struck me in the face hitting my eye. Everything went red, and then I saw nothing. When I screamed for Hiko blood and water filled my mouth and I could do nothing. It was soon after I learned that everyone from my village was killed including my beloved and my family. So you see, Kouran, I too know your pain and suffering, now you know mine." He finished, carefully placing the mask over his face.

I couldn't find words to respond to his story, but I found strength to accept the things that had happened in this miserable day. Feeling miserable for behaving so badly, and still feeling the loss of everything, I let the tears fall as they may. They were something I knew I couldn't hold onto forever. Chichiri put a comforting hand on my shoulder; he knew what I was feeling. I turned and buried my face in his shoulder.

"Go ahead," he said, "let it all out, tomorrow is on its way and our journey is just beginning. You'll need your strength no da." He let me cry, and stroked my hair until I fell asleep there in his arms. Through his kindness and understanding, I found my only true source of comfort and found peace in the serenity of sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

I did not stir until the next day when the sun was shining on my tear stained face. To my surprise I smiled at the sun, feeling its warmth on my face. I felt renewed and relieved of all my hurt, like I had been given a fresh start in life. Then I realized where I was, I had snuggled in Chichiri's arms all night. He to have just awakened, and was staring at the beautiful golden sky as the sun rose to start another day. I just sat there looking at his peaceful expression. Realizing what I was doing, my face went red. What the hell was I thinking? I was acting like a chick! My head was running away with me. I hardly knew this man! Quickly I sat up, sliding out of his warm and comforting embrace.

"Good morning," he said cheerfully, "You had quite a lot to drink last night, no da? How are you feeling?"

"F-fine!" I stuttered nervously, hiding my still blushing face. Without explaining, I grabbed an empty canister and walked off to the pond where I had bathed the night before. Returning, I poured the canister over Suta, who was still drooling away in her sleep. Feeling the cold water spatter on her face, she leaped to her feet and rubbed her face. Having been friends with her for as long as I have been, I've learned it was pretty much the only way to wake her up without getting punched in the face.

"I'm Up!" she grouched.

"I see that," I said, coolly.

"You better get Tasuki to, he's awful in the morning, no da" Chichiri explained.

Without further words, Suta ripped the canister of remaining water and dumped it on Tasuki's head. He suddenly tossed and flung his arms in the air.

"I'M DROWNING! HEEELP!" He cried, before he opened his eyes to see the only thing was drowning in was air. "You bitch! What was that for?" He roared as Suta and I chuckled at his anger. He continued to fume about being wet and being so rudely awakened until Chichiri called us over for food. This whole time he had been frying some fish.

"Good to see you're doing better today Kouran. You guys better eat up, we should set out as soon as possible, before the next battle starts up, no da?" Chichiri advised wisely.

'That's right,' I thought silently in my mind,' How strange I forgot about it.'

"You're right, the woods won't be safe once it starts. And once the battle ends, they'll be looking for us."

"Sweet! Bring em on! those Pervs!" Suta cheered, throwing a triumphant fist in the air.

"You're gonna be more trouble than you're worth! All you women are!" Tasuki grumbled, dreading the on coming journey in the company of two other women. We hastily finished our fish, and set out for Konan, the country I would make my home... for as long as the Gods allowed me. I spent the day reflecting on the hectic night before. Having been in battle most of my life has hardened my soul against such over emotional and feminine feelings, or at least that's what I had believed. Sutashi kept looking at me, as if to reassure herself that I was really okay. I was so grateful to have her with me through all this, I can't imagine having to go through all this without a friend like her to back me up. Occasionally she'd try and lend a hand or comfort me, as much as I had appreciated the gesture, I refused to allow her to think I had changed so much and had been made weak by circumstance. I wanted her to know that I was still strong and unwilling to let this get the best of me.

"What the hell are you looking at? Fire for brains!" Sutashi yelled at Tasuki, breaking me from my on going train of thought.

"Nothing, you .. girl! Why the hell do you think I'd be looking at you!" He spat back at her. I had to admit, listening to those two bicker at one another was damn amusing! I was beginning to think that Suta had finally met her match when it came to sake and sarcasm. There was a short pause before he tried to speak again. For a man who loathed my gender, he loved to push Suta's buttons.

"So…how did you and your friend meet? Slumber party?" Tasuki teased.

"Shut Up Perv!" and with that she chucked a stick at his head. This lead to an ongoing battle of wits and name calling for the rest of the entire journey. They were truly the entertainment on this trip.

For four days, we traveled without assault or any sign of spies from my country looking for Suta and I. It was the afternoon of the fourth day that we arrived to the peaceful lands of Konan. Small towns and villages sprawled outwards from the Emperors Palace, elegantly located in the very heart of the country. It was so strangely different from the hometown I knew, the people all seemed to be happily employed in their daily chores and other occupations. They smiled and bowed respectfully as we all walked by, some were obviously made curious by the appearance of my friend and I. Obviously we'd make a scene, as we were both dressed in Kutoh armor. We easily made our way through the winding roads to the Palace, which was surrounded by imperial guards.

"Kouran, we're going to have to pretend that you two are prisoners. This way we can get though the crowds and the palace gates without any confrontation, No Da." Chichiri suggested, again it was probably a wise suggestion. Everyone was looking at us so strangely, they probably did think we were prisoners of war, or something of the sort.

" Oh no you don't I am NOT gonna be no ones prisoner!" Sutashi growled in protest.

"Shut your trap!," Tasuki rolled his eyes,"Woman, you are going to get yourself killed or worse get me killed!" Tasuki made quick with a fake gesture of hostility and covered Suta's mouth with his hand. In seconds he removed it and began whining horribly as he waved his hand in the air. " AAH SHE LICKED ME! YOU SICK PIG! WHAT'D YOU DO THAT FOR! DAMN YOU WOMAN!" I sighed as I watched, anyone could have told him that was coming. He stormed off just ahead of us whining and complaining about his poor contaminated hand.

"You know, Chichiri does have a point, Suta, It would make more sense if we were taken in as prisoners, and it wouldn't draw as much attention from the towns people." I cautioned her, hoping that my explanation would convince her to be cooperative for once in her life.

" Arg! Fine!" Suta rolled her eyes and gave in, grumbling profanities under her breath the whole time. We put our hands together behind our backs as if they were tied - it was such short notice, we didn't have any rope to actually tie them with. Chichiri marched behind us, pushing us along the path to our destination. After hearing our agreement to act as prisoners, Tasuki returned to our side with a smirk on his face. He couldn't resist the opportunity to rub it in Suta's face. Shoving her forward he said,

"That's right! get moving you Kutoh scum!"

" Refer to me as 'Kutoh scum' one more time you fire brained bastard, and you'll be lucky if you have an ass to sit on when we get to the palace!" with that she slyly stomped her on his right boot. He quickly yelped in pain, grabbing his foot and hopping along, cursing her every step of the way. Having put him in his place, she smiled triumphantly as they passed through the small market place surrounding the palace walls. Thankfully it wasn't long before we reached the ornate palace doors. Once seeing Chichiri and Tasuki, the imperial guards quickly opened the doors and made way for us to come inside. Once up a few flights of stairs, Chichiri and Tasuki left us to sit outside and catch our breaths. What the hell was with palaces having so many flights of stairs anyway? Kutoh 's palace was far more horrible to reach when it came to steps, perhaps we should be grateful... As we caught our breath and waited for the boys to return, we gazed at our beautiful surroundings. Sakura trees lined some of the paths leading away from the red roofed palace into ornate temples and gardens.

When they finally emerged from the palace, we were surprised to see the Emperor had joined them and was heading our way. Suta and I looked at one another and quickly bowed to him. So this was to be my new Emperor that I would serve until my destiny caught up to me. Wanting to make a good impression, I dared not stand and face him.

"Please stand up, and let me see the brave warriors from Kutoh that have traveled so far to come here." We looked up at him cautiously, not knowing just what to think of him. To our surprise, he was an incredibly beautiful man. He stood there smiling warmly at us with his long silken brown hair lightly flowing in the soft breeze. "Chichiri and Tasuki have informed me of your request to join my military. Though I normally would not choose to allow warriors of an enemy country to join our side but Seeing as how Chichiri is one of my most wisest and closest friend and among my strongest warriors, I will make an acceptation for the both of you. With that having been said, Let me be the first to welcome you to Konan! I invite you both to join me in a feast this evening, to celebrate Konan's victory in a recent battle with Kutoh . Please allow my servants to assist you with whatever you may need." He smiled softly, gave a slight nod and left to return to his palace.

"Phew! Glad that's over with, no da!" Chichiri sighed in relief, " I thought we'd be in there forever." He slumped his shoulders over looking as though a heavy weight had been lifted off his shoulders.

"You're telling me!" Tasuki yawned and stretched, " Hotori talks forever!" As he spoke, two servant girls were making there way towards us.

'They must be ours' Being in a foreign country was a new sensation that I could easily deal with, but servants would definitely take time.

" Well, I guess we'll leave you here, no da; These girls will take care of you. See you at the feast!" Chichiri said cheerfully.

"Later!" Tasuki quickly added before he ran off as if relieved to finally be rid of us. The servant girls led us through the exquisite halls of the Emperors palace. The both of us could not help but gape at its beautiful architecture and complementing artistry, brightly colored banners hung gracefully in the massive hallways. This was a most welcome change in scenery after sleeping out in the wilderness with hundreds of pig headed men. Most of all I was exceedingly grateful that our rooms had a private bath house. I haven't had a proper bath in who knows how long! ... I mean a **private** bath without having to worry about those damn peeping soldiers who called themselves men!

Then it hit me, I was really out of place here. Here I am in my former enemy's elegant palace, wearing a warrior's armor from the country they hate. I was dirty from sleeping in the dirt for the last few days; there were pieces of grass and twigs in my hair! Grant that I'm a warrior, I may not always demonstrate the typical delicate characteristics of my gender, but I am a woman. I felt as though all the women were staring at me as if my friend and I were from the circus. Sutashi seemed oblivious to all this... she reeked of Sake and was filthier than I was.

"You will bathe, and dress appropriately before joining the Emperor and his friends for the feast this evening." Spoke one of the servants.

"I _bathed_ a week ago," Sutashi mocked, "The Emperor can just deal with the clothes I'm wearing."

I couldn't help but snort at that remark; I couldn't imagine Sutashi in ' proper attire'. She was even less feminine than I was! 'This is going to be good' I thought to myself.

The servant who had spoken stopped and turned swiftly around to meet Sutashi's gaze with a challenging grin on her face.

"You will bathe, or BE bathed," she threatened. I couldn't hide the smirk on my face after that, Sutashi was a VERY stubborn women. We had reached the bath house; I went in calm and willing. The servant who had yet to speak followed me in quietly.

"Are those the only clothes you have?" she asked. There was a kind sincerity in her sweet little voice. I nodded sadl, I hadn't owned an actual gown since before I went off to train for war. She smiled and told me not to worry. Somewhere nearby I could hear Sutashi still putting up a fight. Looking out the window I could see that the servant had called for reinforcements. They were dragging my kicking and screaming friend into the bath house, picking off her manly armor as they went and finding hidden sake bottles one after another. By the time I was soaked and scrubbed with oils and fragrances, they were still trying to scrub the dirt off Sutashi. If you didn't know any better you might think that they were trying to wash a very large and violent cat.

The servant had left for a brief period to 'fetch me some robes' and whatever else I do not know. In moments she returned with two other women, they were carrying with them little baskets. I could only guess what they were.

"Is that all for me?" I asked nervously. The ways of making other women pretty was a mystery to me, I left for war before my mother had the chance to teach me. My poor mother.. I shook off the melancholy feeling building up from the memory of her. 'This is not the time' I told myself.

The servant only nodded at me and wrapped me up in a large towel as I came out of the water. I looked out the window and sighed, "Yup.. They're still at it." Water was still splashing everywhere; the sound was only partially covering the sounds of her wailing and cursing the servants. People were running back and forth with bottles of soaps and oils. Needless to say, it was quite an amusing scene; I couldn't wait to tease her about it!

I was quickly lead back to my room by the two servants, who were now drying me off. I don't think I had ever seen myself so clean, or smell so good! 'So this is what I was missing all the while' they dressed me in fine garments made of embroider silks and fine linens. While one woman did my hair, another was drawing on my face with cosmetics. After some time they stopped and looked back as if admiring their work. Words could not express how awkward I felt at that moment. I stood up and walked to the full length mirror sitting in the far left corner in the room. Oddly, my heart was pounding in my chest.

I looked at myself in the royal mirror. It may sound strange, but I had seldom if ever even looked at my reflection. People with money had mirrors, my family often went without. The last I had seen my own face was months ago, face smeared with dirt and blood stains on my soldiers uniform. That wasn't the face I saw staring back at me. I was breathless, I was beautiful, I had a figure I never realized I had! Tear's welded up in my eyes with a single realization- I looked like my mother.

I was dolled up in Konan's finest, adorned with jewels and flowers in my long flowing hair. Half my hair was done up in elaborate braids, the other half left down. Now being so clean it reminded me of the waves in a river. I wore layers of long robes and a sort of waste cincher around my waist, which exaggerated my womanly figure. No dirt, no weapons, no amour, I felt exposed and naked without them.

"She is trying to kill me!" Screamed a familiar voice, "You crazy bitch!" Sutashi burst into my room in a panic. I instantly forgot my former thoughts and about near died with laughter. SHE WAS IN A DRESS! A Pink one no less! Her hair was only half up in a bun, half down like mine. She was franticly ripping off the jewels while trying to wipe the makeup off her face. Despite the unfinished look about her, she looked like a lovely little princess.

"Well don't you look -" I winced with a pain in my side from laughing.

"Say it and I'll kill you!" She glared at me with a fire in her eyes.

"Lady!" was the word I managed to get out from all the laughing. "Let me help you, you're a mess" She sat pouting on the floor like a five year old that didn't get its way and hissed at the servants that were now leaving my room. I returned some of the jewels lying on the floor back to Suta's head.

"That women will DIE! "She exaggerated "that INSOLENT BEAST WOMEN WHO TRIED TO WASH ME!"

"Well, you weren't giving them an easy time. Besides, " I bent down and smushed her face together, "At least that dress matches those lovely lips of yours." I teased. Just as she was about to pounce on me and try to beat my face in, the door slid open. There stood Chichiri, wearing a burgundy suit. It was lined with gold and displayed a phoenix across his chest. Tasuki appeared behind him, also well groomed, wearing a noble suit that looked similar to Chichiri's, but black.

Tasuki's eyes opened wide, like an owls. They both looked surprised, the room was feeling very warm all the sudden. 'Damn! I'm blushing!' I thought as I wrestled with my mind to keep the blood from rushing to my face.

"You clean up well!" Tasuki cheered.

"Thanks," was all I could mange above my beating heart. Why was it beating so hard? Am I ill? I was going through all the possibilities in my mind. All while staring at Chichiri's cheerful looking mask.

"Maybe we should have knocked no da?" Chichiri finally broke his silence, noting that Suta was still hovering over me ready to beat my face in from teasing her earlier.

"We're here to escort you gals to the feast, being your capturers and all." Tasuki explained sarcasticly with a cheesy grin on his face. The whole trip here he had been complaining about how much he hated women, and now he had turned into a sly wolf in a nice black suit.

"Men," I sighed, rolling my eyes. 'How typical' I thought silently. Tasuki worked his way across the room and offered Sutashi his hand to help her up. Why? I'm not entirely sure. This was all a new experience to me…Was this what being a girl is like? I couldn't help but wonder. Suta glared at him for a moment, also unsure of herself and what she should do. I knew by the look on her face she was plotting some way to accept it and not feel stupid for doing so. At that moment, she smiled sweetly at him, gracefully took his hand... and yanked him to the floor and she helped herself up.

"Why thank you!" she hummed gleefully, satisfied with how she had handled the situation.

After watching the amusing display of pride by my dear friend and Tasuki, I picked myself up off the floor - or at least tried to. Almost predictably, as I went to stand up, I stepped on my dress and tripped. I was just about to fall flat on my face when Chichiri stepped in, grabbing my hand as it franticly searched for balance. He yanked me backwards, causing me to fall backward into his chest. Perhaps to keep me from falling back again, He quickly wrapped an arm around my waist to hold me up. Mortified in humiliation with my open display of my clumsiness. Dresses were the devil's tool! I stood there for a moment as the blood again came rushing to my head. How is it that he's constantly causing this sensation in me? I'm always blushing around him.

"That was close!, You should try to be more careful no da!" Chichiri cautioned. He released me once assured that I had regained equilibrium. I nodded my head stupidly, for some reason words to thank him with just wouldn't come out of my mouth. I brushed myself off cooly, tossed my hair back and headed towards the door where Suta was waiting. She was grinning at me profusely as if she knew something I didn't. None the less, together, the four of us made our way through the imperial gardens.

The sun had begun to set in the sky, casting its last warming glow upon the world. The most decadent paper lanterns were strung through poles and low branches. Set below them was a feast truly befitting an Emperor. The intricately sculpted wooden tables were covered from one end to the other with large and elaborate plates of steaming roast duck, mouth watering glazed chicken, pork, rabbit, and even lamb. There were golden serving trays towering over the table as centerpieces filled with fresh fruits and vegetables. Before I had even realized it my mouth was watering with gluttony. Never before had I ever seen so many delectable delicacies in my entire life. It was truly the most glorious feast my eyes had ever beheld. Sitting at the head of this unrivaled feast was of course, our humble host, the Emperor Hotohori himself. Even a woman would have to envy his beauty, but more interesting than his looks, was the diverse company that he kept. Happily, he invited the four of us to join his table. Instantaneously, servants pulled out our seats for us. Having been in the palace of my former country once before, I had a rough idea of these odd practices. Suta, however, did not. She glared at the servants suspiciously before she slowly eased herself down into the finely crafted chair that awaited her. This was far too formal for the both of us. We were a couple of tom boys in a little girls fantasy world, and neither of us knew just how much more foreign things could get in this place. Having vaguely remembered my mother's urging to be a polite little girl once upon a time, I hardly dared to slouch in such finery.

In his way, Hotohori tried his best to make us both comfortable as his guests. He began introductions around the table.

"Allow me to introduce everyone," Hotohori spoke softly. Looking at Sutashi and I he continued, "Everyone, these are my new guests for the time being. They've come a long way to join us in the war against Kutoh. This is Kouran, and Sutashi, and I should hope that as my guests you will treat them with kindness." Nothing like having the crowds' attentions on you, the whole table was staring at us curiously. Through the course of the meal they happily introduced themselves to us. There were two other women at the table with us… or so we originally thought. A man, not quite as beautiful as the emperor but none the less fare in face, was a cross dresser. Nuriko, I believe that's what he said his name was, a friendly fellow… obviously obsessed with the emperor, half the meal he spent pining over him and gossiping like a teenage girl with this strange girl. The girl's name was Miaka, Suta and I could not help but observe her curiously as she was dressed in the most unusual clothing either of us had ever beheld. Chichiri explained to us that she was the priestess of Suzaku, a child of another world. I wondered how well her home life in her world was doing, because she ate as though she'd had not eaten in months. When she was not stuffing her face with food, she was snuggled up and staring longingly at the man next to her, Tamahome. Lovers, obviously, admirably the sight of their open affections towards each other was enough to cause one to lose their last meal. Suta stared them down with her icy gaze, she hated such sappy behaviors - she was very conservative… or so she claimed. Among the rest of the table, was a boy no more than 12. I could not imagine a youth so young being a warrior of such capabilities. For a moment I had actually though he was the Emperors son, a silly mistake - they looked nothing alike. The boy introduced himself as Chiriko, an adorable lad indeed. Lastly, sitting besides the warrior boy, was a large man with a scarf around his head. Of all the odd characters at the table, he looked most capable of being a warrior, but like the rest of the Emperors guests, he was not so much what he seemed. He was a peaceful man of great healing powers.

We dined greedily on the feast before us, chatting and joking happily the whole evening. It was still an awkward feeling, being dolled up like an actual woman for the first time in my life. Sitting at a table with such an elite group of people, including the Emperor and his priestess, was an event that exceeded my imagination. They were all so happy and kind to one another, as true friends would be. Not at all like Kutoh , a country full of hatred and selfishness with a beast for a ruler. Girlish thoughts aside, it was truly the happiest time I had had in my life… also my stomach had never been so full.

Once all had left the table I went for a stroll alone through the Emperors gardens. I walked silently reflecting on the evening and the sweet sincerity of those who played a part in it. For this moment, the gods had shown mercy on my miserable and lonely life. As I walked on, I found the priestess gazing into the garden ponds alone. Hearing my steps near her, she looked up and smiled warmly.

"Great meal huh?" she beamed happily," It was nice to have other woman around for once! Nuriko is the closest I get to a female friend in this place."

"So I noticed," I smiled back, almost laughing at the thought of how feminine that man was. "It's good to see that you get along so well with your warriors, they all seem so very fond of you."

"Yeah, they're great! They're all very protective of me; it makes me happy to have someone that cares." Miaka explained. She hardly ever stopped smiling, must be nice to not truly know of sorrow. It was really not hard to see why her warriors were eager to protect her and stay in her presence. She was such a humble and innocent girl, I to would not have minded protecting such a person. "So, you came here from Kutoh? What made you change your mind?"

"Yes, Kutoh is my native land, but it is a troubled place. The emperor is a liar and starves his people for the sake of having more for himself. Is it hard to imagine why anyone would leave the place when they've found the truth?" She looked shocked and hurt by my description of my former home.

"Oh I'm so sorry! I had no idea it was so awful! Perhaps when there is a priestess of Seriyuu, she will help to make things right." Miaka spoke in an attempt to give hope. There was no hope for Kutoh …

"I once heard something of a strange foreign girl possibly becoming the priestess, but there have been no offers from her." I grumbled. The girl, whoever she was would probably run in terror of such a place than try to stay and fix the problems occurring there. To my surprise Miaka gasped at my mentioning such a girl.

"Really? Did you hear anything else?" She asked eagerly.

"Sorry, but nothing that I can recall," I said, offering a sympathetic smile. There was a long pause as we stood there with our thoughts. I had never really put much though on there ever being a priestess in Kutoh . I wondered why she was so interested, perhaps she did not travel to this world alone." So how is the life in the world you come from?"

" Haha! It's a lot more complicated than this place." She giggled and scratched her head, "Everyone's always running about trying to get somewhere or do something. Not like here. Wars aside life seems a lot more peaceful and quiet in this world." The peaceful quiet that she spoke of was then broken by the sound of Suta in yet another ridiculous argument with Tasuki. Maybe not…They sure don't get along very well do they?" she said as the happy smile she often wore returned to her face. How is this girl always so happy?

"With an ego like Suta's there's bound to be trouble with men." I laughed. It really was true. Sometimes I wondered how she lived with such an attitude towards others. She was always starting brawls with our soldiers… grant they usually started it by provoking her rage. How many times did I go bail her out of bar and camp fights before she and everyone else got to bloodied up before a battle had even begun? Hopefully, when I'm forced to leave this place, she'll have these good people here to look after her as I had. Taking her back to that awful place of no peace was not an option in my mind. Perhaps she and Tasuki would eventually win each other over. They fought like a married couple anyways. "You know, sometimes I think those two would make a good couple." I said in jest. The thought of Suta playing the role of a house wife was suddenly the most devilishly hilarious thing I had ever come up with.

"You know I think you're up to something!" Miaka, priestess of Suzaku, giggling child of a world unknown said with sudden realization. "I should play matchmaker!" she jumped and giggled franticly at the idea.

'Oh Gods…' I sighed heavily under my breath. Miaka meddling with Suta was probably not the best idea for someone like her. Though I truly had to admire her optimism and childish enthusiasm.

"OH! I'm gonna go tell Nuriko! He'll be thrilled! Come with me!" she squealed, yanking my arm and dragging me along behind her to Nuriko's quarters in the palace. Being a grown man and a warrior I had hoped that he'd be rational and tell her not to meddle with the lives of others, especially people with short tempers. Alas, He was as giddy as his priestess about the whole sneaky idea.

'Well, looks like I'm stuck with this' I mused in thought, 'Should be interesting to say the least.' They were already plotting all sorts of trickery to play on the two.

"You've done this before haven't you." I asked with a hunch. The two just smiled evily.

"Oh, you know, just a girl thing" Nuriko spoke waving her hand in dismissal of the thought. Did he say 'girl thing'? What were they up to... "Hey, why don't you go keep an eye on our little love birds." Nuriko teased .. obviously I was not to be involved with the plotting at this moment. I was rather grateful to be dismissed. "Oh! Hey, take this with you! Make sure Suta gets it." He winked at me as I walked out the sliding door, if that's not the creepiest thing. I don't believe I've ever had anyone wink at me before… especially not a cross dresser.

I went to Suta's room and set it on her bed, she was still out arguing with her 'fire for brains' lover. HAHA! Gods that's funny. As quick as I had come, I slipped out of the room and walked through the gardens once more. So much drama here… I was assuming the note was a sort of love letter "meet me tonight" sort of thing. I think that's how it went. Childs play, that's what all this was. If I had not been a warrior, would I be like them? Sad to say, I was still struggling to adapt to my new little life in Konan.

As if he had materialized out of thin air, Chichiri was suddenly behind me.

"Lot of Changes in one day," he said, "Must take some time to get used to, no da"

"Affirmative," I said..wanting to smack myself. What the hell was that? 'Affirmative'? Could I not think of something better to say! " heh… uh, I guess Miaka and Nuriko are trying to pair off Tasuki with Suta, hah! They must be crazy."

"Yeah if those two don't kill each other first, no da!" he said with a glance back towards the palace. By the sound of it, they were STILL at it. In the distance you could hear Tasuki yelling.

"Come back here woman! I'll burn you alive!" he roared, most likely with his little magic fan in hand.

"Tasuki! How many times have I told you not to use that thing in my palace! You'll burn us all!" Hotohori intercepted. Once could also hear a "THPT!" .. which I could only assume was Suta sticking her tongue at Tasuki.

"Why you! Come back here and face me like a man!... er.. Warrior!" he spat back.

I could not resist laughing at the sound of them, nor could Chichiri.

"Perhaps if they were drunk?" I suggested.

"You might be on to something there, no da" We looked on towards their direction, and after a moment he began to stretch. "Whelp, its getting late, no da? I'm going to get some sleep. Tomorrow I must continue my training, no da."

"Perhaps I'll join you." I said, slighting leaning towards him. Good Gods, was I flirting with him? Thank god he's not noticing!

"Sure!" he replied, making my heart skip. "Then I'll see you tomorrow, no da!" and with that he left my side to return to his own room.

'Wonder what his room is like- ' I slapped myself across the face before the rest of that thought could continue. What was it with this place? Does this come with the dress or something? That's it I'm getting out of this thing - now!

Running off towards my room, I got out of the torturous evil garments I had been so carefully dressed in earlier. None the less, peace would not return to my mind. Damn thoughts of _him _were running through my head all night, making me needlessly nervous for the coming of the new day. Damn him and his stupid cute mask! How dare he make me drop my guard and be so infected with his kindness…Great, now I was pouting.. Great!


	3. Chapter 3

The next morning I awoke to the birds chirping outside my window. Stretching underneath the most comfortable linens imaginable, I rolled my way out of bed and dressed myself in my usual clothes I wore under my armor. A girl could definitely get used to this life; it was like one of those vacations people often speak of. Somehow I did manage to fall asleep last night, however little amount of sleep I did manage to find did not matter. I was awake, and strangely calm and content with the world for once in my life. Usually I woke up sore and dreading what would come with the rising of the sun… but not today. This glorious morning, the air smelled of delicious food - breakfast I assumed.

I pulled open my door and made my way through the courtyards, smelling my way to the food… It was food I was looking for, but what I found was equally as satisfying. Suta was tiredly stomping her way to her room, looking dead tired and exhausted. She was constantly tripping over the dress - which she still wore, and staggering towards me half asleep already.

"Good Morning! Rough night?" I asked brightly, pulling blades of grass out of her hair. PHEW! She reeked of Alcohol! What did Miaka and Nuriko do to these poor fools?

"SHH! Why are you yelling!" she whined, "Don't even speak of last night!" yawning, she rubbed her eyes, "That red headed peacock challenged me to out drink him - If he asks… I won." With a drowsy glare through sleep crusted eyes, she continued to strut her way to her room."I'm sleeping for the next year! -No…wait- wake me for the war!" She said as she reached her bedroom door and practically fell through it.

Not surprisingly, Tasuki was also not present at breakfast. Walking towards the table, I felt a hand pull my arm. Miaka was already wide eyed and ready for gossip, as was Nuriko who looked about ready to burst. Smiling already, Miaka said, " Sutashi and Tasuki got soo drunk last night -"

"They were snuggling up together and passed out!" Nuriko finally caved in. They were jumping and giggling franticly once more. "This is gonna be easier than we thought! Hahah!"

"They'll be like me and Tamahome in no time!" Miaka swung side to side, hands clasped together. Please! It's to early for this! Even on a day like this! I gave a short giggle and wished them good luck, trying to politely shake them off and get to the beautiful food that was waiting for me. "Hey, Kouran! In a few days you should come with us into town! Nuriko and I are going to sample food in the market place! Oooh the food is sooo yummy here, you just have to come!" … Good grief, how could anyone say no to a begging child with a sweet face?

"Perhaps after I'm done training," I suggested, giving them hope, but not a definite answer. Before they went to groveling I leaped at the chance to escape them both and made a quick walk for the breakfast table. Mmmm breakfast…

Having more than satisfied my appetite, I joined the rest of the Konan warriors that were already sparring with other soldiers. As usual the boys felt they had to take it easy on me because I unfortunately own a pair of boobs. But that's alright, I've learned accept their prejudice against me. After some convincing, I finally talked some of the boys into sparing with me in hand to hand combat. I'd teach them not to be prejudice against women!

With a swift kick to the jaw, the soldier who had so smugly stood before me was sent flying backwards. After an hour of that, I was bored and went on to practice with my sword. I believe they said I was "not bad, for a girl." Not bad? Not bad at all. Being wrapped up in training, I did not get the chance to really watch the celestial warriors show off their powers in sparring with one another.. but I was sure to make them see me. Especially Chichiri… GAH! There I go again! Doomed! I'm So Doomed! I give up!

I like the bastard. Damnit all!

Not more than an hour or so later I was sitting in the imperial gardens once again. It had quickly become my favorite place to sit and just think. At this time, all my thoughts were bent on finding some way to escape my cruel ironic fate. How my strength and abilities would change with this power once I had it? If I ever had it, that is. One would think I would often use these powers I shared with my brother, perhaps, I would had I not known any better. The truth of it all is my mother had a child who was deformed half animal half human. Despite this she loved him as much as she could before the army took him away, he was a celestial warrior. A man of great knowledge had told the General of Kutoh that my brother Ashitare would be a great warrior of Seriyuu. It was also said because of his deformities he wouldn't live as long as other warriors, and that should my parents have another child they would become the next warrior once Ashitare had died. He also foretold the power of the tail is unique unto the other warriors in a sense that when the warrior with the tail symbol dies, they are not automatically reincarnated like the others are. Instead the power goes to the next of kin until there is none left - at which point it begins again with reincarnation. Then I was born my parents never let anyone know I was marked even though the symbol appeared when I was enraged, had people known I that I was marked, my life would be that of a slave, a 'prisoner' to the Emperor and to his army like that of my brother. That was the very cruel truth that kept me in my place all this time, pretending I was simply a normal human being.

That entire reason aside, and more importantly so, I could sense the presence of my older brother. He was always locked away somewhere in the palace where I would never see or reach him. Always I could sense him there, suffering in pain and loneliness; it was agonizing not being able to comfort him.

It was shortly afterward the marked showed my father began my training me in ways of combat. Gods! The thought of them still hurts, in the silence of the moment allowed the soft breezes carry my prayers for them away with the hateful images of their graves in my mind. If only there was a way I could stay here like this for the rest of my days…

Like timework, the peace was torn by the shrill arguing of Suta and Tasuki… Once again raging on like the storms of spring time. Grinning, I sat and listened to their amusing arguments.

"Oh Yeah! Not only can I out run you, I can out drink you to!" Suta boasted. It was obvious she enjoyed taunting this man.

"In your dreams little girl! I was the winner and champion at that sake drinking contest! I beat you then and I'll beat you now!" Tasuki snarled back exposing one fang.

"Put your money where your mouth is bandit" she continued, pushing his buttons.

"Fine! a race to the eastern gardens, Last one there's a stupid girl!" He shouted, already running eastward in my direction. Sutashi flew off after him immediately. Damn he was fast… She might actually lose! Suta never lost to anyone - especially a man. What could I say when she was finally crushed by defeat? The two were so much alike it was enough to give me a headache just thinking about it. Perhaps she'd let him win… which would be an obvious displace of her affections for him. The guy was cute, I'd give him that. But something told me that getting in over your head with this guy would only get you burned. Then again, perhaps she wanted to be burned, either way she was definitely in over her head for this man.

They were almost to the gardens, I could see them coming. Suta was practically on his heels, already caught up to him. It was then that Suta pulled out her bag of tricks.

"AHH! She's naked!" she screamed, pointing off to the side at nothing. At that he stopped for just a second. Obviously, it was just long enough for Suta to pretty much run him over, which she did… almost literally. She leaped right onto the poor chumps back like an annoying 4 year old kid sister. "I win!" she chirped happily with a smile on her face as he moaned in pain.

"I hate WOMEN!" He growled underneath her as she sat joyously on his back. Her flirtatious gesture had actually managed to royally piss him off. Understandably his precious male ego was crushed by the fact that he had been tricked and did not actually defeat the girl who seemed to be his match in everything he did.

Laughing at the whole scene before me, Suta flashed me an angry look and stomped off. She was obviously pissed that her little trick had made him be in so sour a mood. Perhaps she was also pissed that she even had to resort to such a thing to just tie with him and not lose. One day she'll learn that life is not all about winning, even if you are a warrior. She truly was one of the strongest, and most stubborn prideful women I had ever met.

I stood up and began to walk along the stone paths which traveled aimlessly through the grounds. The palace of Kutoh was far less welcoming than this the palace of Emperor Hotohori. Here there were lush gardens and warm breezes, making all feel at ease even in the greatest of mental strife, where as there, there were only harsh palace walls and cold stone floors making everyone uncomfortable with themselves. To think my poor brother dwelled there. Konan was definitely a prosperous country, but despite its productivity everyone maintained a cheerful attitude towards life. Rich or poor, everyone here was humble and kind. This place was heaven in comparison to the misery that was my home land. I was completely determined to stay here as long as I could… which was most likely as long as my brother lived. Whatever came then I would just have to face at that appointed time, but not now.

A few calming days had passed every day was training, eating and plotting with Miaka . She had 3 failed attempts to get them together most were because they would get drunk and just start fighting. I was nice getting to just have fun for once and when Miaka invited me again to go shopping in Konan. I couldn't refuse it was a Star festival that night and while most days I had been wearing normal plain dresses which I was soon able to handle. For the festival the servants came to dress me for the occasion, the brought out a teal blue robe which was then covered by a darker blue skirt and a yellow ribbon to tie the skirt on was wrapped around me twice forming a nice bow in front of me. The servants did my hair in two braided loops wrapped with ribbons and flowers. I looked like I'd never seen a battlefield and for a few minutes I could pretend to be a normal girl going out to a festival with friends. My thoughts were broken by Miaka coming in to get me she was dressed similar to me and she looked very pretty for one so young.

"Kouran we been waiting for you.. Wow you look amazing; I think Chichiri is going to flip out!" She all but squealed excitedly. Okay once I figure out what exactly flip out means I am sure I could come up with a reply to that.

"Um he is going to what exactly?" I asked.

"He is going to be amazed you're so beautiful, I know you like him Kouran why won't you admit it?" Okay so she was astute for being so young, either that or I was obvious.

"Is it that obvious?" I blurted out not meaning to. "I mean if I was to like him not saying I do.." I trailed I wasn't girly enough for this stuff.

"Kouran, I may be young but I know a crush when I see it, that's how I know Sutashi and Tasuki are going to fall in love. I see the way you look at Chichiri and I know he looks at you behind that mask, just give him time he will show you." She said taking my hand "come on everyone is waiting" She pulled me toward the door. In that moment I saw what made all these warriors love Miaka so much, she may just be a young girl but she was full of love for everyone. She was even nice to me from the moment we met she never treated me as anything but a friend.

We met Tamahome and the others outside the Palace walls; Chichiri was there apparently everyone dresses up for these festivals. Chichiri was wearing a long dark blue Chinese collared shirt with a yellow jacket over it and blue pants to match he looked very handsome and I had to make myself focus on anything else. Anything that wasn't how the dark blue shirt made his hair that was only a few shades lighter than mine glow in the late evening sunlight. I shook my head and turned to other matters at hand.

"Where is Suta and Tasuki?" I asked not seeing them with the other warriors. "Oh I think they went to the tavern" Tamahome said taking Miaka's hand and kissing it "you look beautiful are you ready to go?" He asked her smiling. "One sec" she then grabbed me dragged me over to Chichiri and grabbing both our hands she place them together so that we were holding hands. "You guys have fun, Chichiri make sure you show Kouran around Konan! K bye!" With that she grabbed Tamahome and left.

Chichiri just looked at me for a few moments then moved his hand away. I was disappointed until he spoke "Well I guess it's just us again no da." Chichiri then took my arm gently "Kouran would you let me show you around Konan?" he asked his mask showing nothing but a smile, "I'd like that" then he led me to the busy Konan streets. The sun was just about to set and the lanterns were being lit brightly colored they looked amazing shining above us. I could smell food from all the venders nearby and I couldn't remember the last time Kutoh had a festival.

"I have to say I think Miaka was planning something tonight," I looked at Chichiri he was so hard to read though that mask of his to my surprise he looked at me.

"Miaka's like that no da, she has strange idea's must be because she isn't from this world no da,"

"Yeah you can say that again no one in this world can eat like that!" I joked Chichiri let out a laugh.

"Ah so you can laugh I was being to think you had no sense of humor." I nudged Chichiri's arm, and gave him a smile to show I was kidding.

"Oh you know I have a sense of humor when I live with this crazy bunch of warriors no da!"

"Yeah, you would have to.. There great but yeah I know how it is I'm friends with Suta and well sometimes she can be a bit much, I guess sometimes I can be pretty serious and that's hard."

Trust me I know no da I'm the oldest in the group sometimes I feel like I babysit no da!" Chichiri said laughing I felt like I could listen to him laugh all day so I joined him. Suddenly he stopped and looked at me his face got closer to mine and for a moment he was so close I couldn't breathe without breathing in his scent he smelled like incents that he probably used to pray and earth. As I was thinking this I also thought he might try to kiss me. I could feel my heart beating my chest ready to explode. He leaned in close his face just inches from mine reached his hand to my neck and pulled a giant dragonfly off me.

"Wow no da that sure is a big dragonfly no da, I thought it was a spider I didn't want to alarm you no da," He said setting the insect on the railing we were standing by "Here ya go nice and safe no da," He spoke to the bug.

I felt I could breathe again after he grabbed that bug, I could feel my racing heart return to normal, what was I thinking of course he wouldn't kiss me. It must me the night heat getting to me. Chichiri turned back to me. "So Kouran, let's get something to eat, I'm hungry for some grilled fish no da," Chichiri took me to a small stand where he seem to know the man.

"Chichiri how is my favorite customer?" the rather large man asked happily.

"I am good no da, I brought my friend here to try some of the best fish around. No da" He said back with the same intensity as the man.

"Well I don't know because you haven't been catching the fish they may not be as good," He turned toward me "Ya know Chichiri here is always bringing me fresh fish to cook and sell he doesn't even charge us, helped the misses and I in times of real trouble. So any friend of Chichiri's is a friend of mine, I'm sorry I didn't catch your name?"

"It's Kouran," I said for the first time in my life feeling a bit shy like I was being courted or something it was strange.

"Kouran, what a beautiful name for such a beautiful lady, where did Chichiri find such a beautiful flower such as yourself?" he asked taking my hand and placing a small kiss on it,

I would have normally punched a man for a lesser offence but he was Chichiri's friend so I figured he had to be okay.

"She is a member of the Royal Army no da, She is new but her fighting skills top some of our best men no da." Chichiri said giving me a look that said its okay this guy is no threat, I couldn't figure how he did that though a mask but he was a mage so he could show small emotions with just a simple mask he could also eat with it on as well which was pretty amazing.

"It's an honor to have such strong warrior eat at my humble shop but enough talking now you must eat, and for such a great occasion it's all on me!" with those being his last words he sat us down and ran to the back room to prepare the food.

"Where did you find this place?" I questioned Chichiri who was sitting across from me.

"Well, I passed by here some months ago and he had nothing but noodles I had some time and I love to fish, so whenever I caught more then I could eat I would drop them off to him. no da. Turns out he can cook fish way better than noodles and he began to make a lot more money no da" Chichiri finished as he came back with our food with plates over flowing with food talking stopped. We ate almost everything afterwards Chichiri took the rest in a basket to go. He lead me to a corner of the city I hadn't seen before "Not all Konan is plentiful these are the forgotten people of Konan I try being a Monk to do what I can to help them but this is usually all I can think of." He said leaving off his usual no da I knew this was serious to him he left the basket in a corner of an alley and walked away.

Chichiri and I sat down to watch the paper boats float down the stream; it was a wishing prayer that was done on the full moon. I hadn't seen it since, I was very young but for once it brought back nice memories.

"I used to do this with Hiko and Kouran, it was a custom in my village," Chichiri said as if he was lost in a dream. Again he was dropping the no da I couldn't help but feel a connection, he was confiding in me I could feel in my heart he never confided in anyone. I could only guess it was because I knew the pain he was feeling even if my scars were not physical they still hurt and felt as raw as the day the God's gave me them. I thought of my other scars from my past ones I couldn't escape of run from. Glancing at the open water lit by brightly colored lights and fireflies, I reminisce about my past that I thought I had forgotten the past when I was just a young girl, who wore sweet little dresses with flowers in her hair. A little girl who didn't know what death was, who never had any training, who would cook and clean with her mother. My moments of true happiness that I could only hope would be my salvation in the next life.

I looked at Chichiri and broke the silence that seemed to consume us whenever we were lost in our memories and thoughts.

"I remember a time long ago when this used to be a new beginning in my country, my family and I would do this every full moon to repent the sins of our past and light hope for a new beginning." I confessed. I looked at Chichiri and to my shock and amazement he had taken the mask off and I took a deep breath at the fire reflecting off the water as it shown in his eye.

"I am sorry about your parents, when this deal was made with you, I had no idea the repercussions or the debt you would have to pay for your freedom," He looked at me his one eye looking into mine.

"It was my own choice besides I had no idea what they would go though to keep me, they usually take care of the families of the military people, which is a reason why I joined. I turned toward him. "Can I ask you a question? It's kind of personal," I asked hoping I wasn't being to forward but I needed to find out more about this strange man who I was so drawn too.

"Sure," He nodded his head in approval "Why do you wear the mask," I question ah. I should learn to keep my big mouth shut. He answered despite it.

"It was a gift from well let's say she was a young girl I didn't want her frightened so I wore it, behind it I can feel anything and all people see it a smiling face. When I see the scar I am reminded of that night so it's like my punishment for my sins and I don't think other people should have to see it." Chichiri said.

I guess one of those would be useful right about now," I sighed dropping my shoulders.

"You shouldn't keep people out Kouran, it doesn't help. I know that from years of experience that my way out is the coward's way. Hiding my scar from the world just because it might upset someone its stupid, I should be proud of who I am, but I am not sometimes I hate myself. I am trying to heal that bitter part of my soul but its taken years now I wear the mask because it's more of a habit now I could remove it but I've grown attached. I want that never to happened to you, you're a good person inside and you should not shoulder the blame for all that's happened to you if someone cares for you need to let them in. Time will heal even the biggest wounds and I am living proof." Chichiri finished. "However it's getting late no da! So I think we should get back no da" he got up placed his mask back on his face and took my hand to help me up.

Back at the Palace Chichiri walked me to my room and bid me a good night. I closed the door and leaned against it the cool wood pressing into my back and I could do nothing to stop my beating heart what the heck was wrong with me was I dying? How come every time he was around I felt I couldn't breathe sometimes I even said really stupid things? How could one man have that kind of power over me? My mind drifted back to the moment he looked at me with his mask less face a face that even though was ravaged by a scar was still the most beautiful face I'd ever seen. What didn't this guy do? He fed the poor, took care of the weak and never once thought of himself, he was the glue that held the warriors together without him and I'm not sure they could beat Kutoh. I thought to much for once night and decided I would take a cool bath before going to bed.

That night I was awoken to my name being whispered as if coming from the winds, coming to I decided to follow it. Walking out of my room to the black night I entered the adjoining garden. Wearing just a sleeping robe I could feel the cool night hair blow my hair around my face. I couldn't stop following the voices which seemed to get louder as I followed it. Coming to a halt on the bridge I saw a man dressed in a black robe he looked at me then he smiled the most devilish smile. It was Suboshi another warrior of the Seriyuu seven.

"Kouran, So at last we meet face to face I've heard a lot about you and I know you have heard of me!" His voice held no emotion,

"Soon you will join us and with you we can summon Seriyuu and get anything we desire we Kutoh shall rule all the lands!" He laughed it wasn't funny like Tomo's it was filled with evil.

"What do you want Suboshi?" I screamed back at him.

"What do we want? We want what's ours. .. You! Of course" He replied pointing at me.

"Well you don't have me yet!" I was so angry I shook with every word.

"No, but in the upcoming battle your brother will die and if you do not take his place we will kill everyone you care about including that bitch of a women whom you seem so fond of." He smirked then came after me with his weapon flying with the power of his life force it was two small balls attached to ropes the balls held sharp objects that could tear flesh to pieces. He tossed on in my direction I ducked a rolled away from the attack but it was too late it slashed its way through my robe and into my leg I screamed in pain grabbing the bloody area and rolling away from the upcoming attacks.

At once I heard my name "Kouran!" It was a shout and I opened my eyes to find myself in bed, with Chichiri looking worried and standing over me. It was a dream my mind was forced to come to that conclusion.

"You Okay? no da, I heard you scream I'm surprised none of the other's are up." He looked scared.

"It was just a dream," I assured him "I'm fine you can go back to sleep now," He looked unsure it being so late at night he wasn't wearing his mask so for once I could read his expressions. "If you're sure your okay.." he said as I waved him off. As soon as the door was shut I bolted from the bed pulled up my gown and sure enough there was a huge bruise forming on my leg where Suboshi's weapon had hit me. It was as I had suspected a warning, not a dream but a mixture of a dream and an illusion. Tomo's work no doubt Tomo could make you feel pain he could make you hurt, bleed and even die. You can't do any of the following in a dream. I looked down at the huge purple mark and sighed this was going to be much harder then I had thought. I got back into bed and thankfully had a dreamless sleep.


	4. Chapter 4

I awoke early the next morning despite the bad dream I had experienced last night. I got dressed in a normal robe with a simple tie and left my hair down. I went to break my fast only to see Suta and Tasuki eating together. They looked well rested for once.

"Suta I am going to beat you today in sparing so I just thought I'd let you know in advance." Tasuki was telling her

"In your dreams pal." Suta responded.

"Kouran long time no see," Suta waved. "Where have you been?'

"Well I went to the festival last night with Chichiri, I heard you hit the tavern a little early last night," I finished sitting on the floor joining them.

"Yeah? You were with Chichiri all night? Was that what I heard?" He smiled the devilish of smiles and raised his eye brows at me.

"So that what the screaming was all about huh?" he gave me a playful push. I was turning red as tomato

"Just what the hell are you implying? I had a nightmare that's all," I turned to him my hands up as if I would strangle the life out of him.

"Alright I give! Damn you're scarier then Suta!' Tasuki backed away and I helped myself to some fresh fruit. After I had eaten, I took a small basket of food at the thought I would find Chichiri to better explain last night. I found him relaxing against a tree mask off fishing pole in his hands he looked for the first time peaceful. I was about to back away and give his this moment of peace which he truly deserved only I am not as quick or as stealthy where Chichiri was concerned. I was backing away when my slipper landed in a hole and I felt backwards onto my back I let out a small cry.

I looked up into Chichiri's mask less face hovering above me

"Kouran is that you no da?" I cringed I didn't want him to think I was spying so I responded by doing something I'm not very good at I played stupid.

"Chichiri, oh I was just looking for Miaka when I must have fell in this hole" He reached his hand down and helped me up "He went for the basket laying beside me.

"What's in the basket no da?" He asked, as he reached for the basket a smile spread a crossed his face. "Ooh there's food in here No Da no wonder you were looking for Miaka no da!" He joked.

"Yeah, I thought I might run into Miaka and it's always better to be prepared" I lied smoothly well it was true kind of.

"I see well if you're really going to give her all the food…" he trailed off

"Well if you want some go ahead, it's not like she needs anymore food anyway," I laughed.

"Daaa!" Chichiri dug into the food with gusto. It was so cute wait back it up did I just think that? I shook the thought from my head quickly,

"So you're fishing!" I said trying to get my mind off the now unmasked monk eating the food I had brought.

"Yeah its very relaxing no da, would you like to try it?" He said this while handing me the pole.

"Sure," I took the pole and with Chichiri's help got it into the water.

Meanwhile behind us.

"Miaka, there not close enough to the water to push them in yet," Nuriko whispered to her partner in crime.

"We have to think of something I had good results with plan two festival night, they spent the whole night together and there was touching!" She exclaimed proudly.

"I thought you were with Tamahome how did you have time to watch them?" Nuriko questioned.

"Well I mostly dragged him along when he said that we shouldn't be doing this. I conveniently lost him in a gambling game, I'm so good," Miaka snickered.

"Whoa I think I might have something" I said to Chichiri as he got up to help me bring the fish out of the water with the pole. "Wow no da your good I been sitting here all morning no da not one bite!" He helped me put more bait on the hook and throw it back in.

"Thanks I've never fished before its pretty fun, should we toss it back?" I looked at the poor fish lying there struggling to breathe and thought about how, I was like that fish trying to keep myself together half the time and not being able to breathe through most of it suddenly I had the over whelming urge to toss that poor fish back into the clear blue pond I'd so careless ripped him from.

"Sure I only keep them if I need to eat no da." Chichiri was saying but I was already reaching for that gasping fish beside me and leaning over I let him swim from my hands before I could blink he was gone.

"Look," Nuriko watched as Chichiri and I were leaning over the edge after I'd released that poor fish.

"We move in now! "Nuriko yelled before we could turn two strong hands push us into the water.

"Ahhhhh" I barely had time to scream before I was pushed into the cool water. I swam up breaking the surface and looked at Chichiri his bangs had fallen into his face and he was laughing.

"I knew they were back there planning something no da," He said swimming to where he could stand the cool water was up to his shoulders.

"You knew they were back there?"

"Yeah, no da they got me good I could sense them but not this!" He broke into further laughter

"Well might as well not let this go to waste I looked at shore I couldn't see any one "they must have left." I stated then splashed Chichiri "That's for not telling me they were around I would have… ran." I began to dive under the blue water before he could splash me. Breaking the surface I felt a hand grab my foot and pull me back under Chichiri broke the surface laughing as I came up next to him "Not funny Chichiri I laughed splashing him again. We swam for a big longer splashing and laughing it was a side of Chichiri I'd never thought I would see him just having fun being like a regular person and in that moment I wasn't thinking of anything but just having fun. We stayed in the water for a long time just swimming and talking when we finally realized how much time had passed we dragged ourselves to the shore and began removing the other layers of our clothes to dry them in the sun.

Since I was wearing two robes, I took off one to dry removing my wet shoes I laid down soaking in the bright sunlight, Chichiri soon joined me it was the first time I had seen him shirtless and with him so close to me. I couldn't help but to be aware of my breathing as it quicken, not again I mentally chided myself closing my eyes so I couldn't be tempted to do anything that would probably end up being very embarrassing. I was soon drifting off into a nice nap. Once I awoke I found myself lying in the soft grass with Chichiri a few mire inches away I gazed at him. His hair was undone from the binds, he usually kept it in and it draped gracefully over his shoulder and down to his extremely well build chest I have to admit with the sunlight glinting off of him his body shone and I couldn't take my gaze away. I looked at him for a long time memorizing this moment in case I was never to see it again. Sighing I knew I was in trouble I was falling in love with this man. He wasn't like anyone I'd ever met. He was kind, but strong, Torn but loyal, Scarred but handsome, joking but serious, Powerful more so then any warrior that I'd ever seen with the exception of maybe Nakago but he still was a monk and stood by those beliefs as any other monk would. In short I couldn't have him no matter what I felt, even if he wasn't a monk which he was I had a destiny to fulfill that Chichiri couldn't be a part of as anything other than an enemy so then why didn't I just leave I'd ask myself that time and time again but I couldn't I loved this place and it was very selfish of me to stay but I had to. I was broken from my stressful thoughts as Chichiri stirred beside me, "it's getting late no da" he sat up stretching his arms over his head, I watched as his muscles tensed and pretended not to enjoy myself. "Yeah I can't remember the last time I took a nap, but the sunlight was just to nice today." I said looking at the sun as it began to set staining the sky with its crimson shades. "Me either no da I guess we should head back to the palace." He said putting on his shirt and buttoning it up.

We walked back to the palace and headed to dinner. At dinner the looks we got at the dinner table were embarrassing, everyone was under the impression that Miaka's plan had worked and we were now lovers. Everything either one of us said was turned into an innuendo, such as "It was a really hot day out no da," and "Glad I took that swim," was followed by I bet you are and oh it was? Wasn't it I bet everything's been pretty hot out there today? It was pretty bad when Suta and Tasuki were joining in, after dinner Hotohori told the warriors a there would be a meeting in the throne room. Suta and I decided to spend some time outside sparing.

"So how did your day go with Chichiri?" Suta asked throwing me a punch; I dodged it easily and came at her with one of my own. "Well we got pushed into the pond and ended up swimming, no big deal" She blocked my punch so I came at her with a kick swinging my foot to kick her in the head. She responded by grabbing my foot with her hand and throwing me off balance.

"Okay you win that round but were far from done," I shook the hair out of my eyes and went into a offensive position letting Suta know she would be blocking, she nodded and we bowed, I jumped at her sliding my foot and knocking her off balance I rolled forward and right on top of her.

"Win!" I smiled at her.

"Kouran you always win with that move I don't know why I don't see it coming?" She then wrapped her legs around my waste and tossed me off of her.

"Okay let's do some sword work and call it a night" I said grabbing my sword. We stood next to each other going though the fluid sword movements we were taught in the army.

"So really, what's up with you and Chichiri? You seem to never leave his side." Suta asked while resuming our training.

"Well were friends, I guess I just like talking to him.." I didn't know what to tell her. "How about you and Tasuki don't tell me you don't like him." I said, fine two can play this game.

"Yeah, I do I mean don't you ever tell him that Kouran or I'll pull your tongue out and wrap it around your throat!" She said finishing her last sword swing with more vigor then was necessary.

"Wow, noted do you have to be so graphic really? Fine if were admitting things I like Chichiri too which is next to pointless because he is a monk and as we all know they can't exactly date." Turning to look at her she smiled.

"Well I wouldn't worry about that you have plenty of time to get him to reconsider his chosen profession." She laughed.

"Nice, well I will keep that in mind meanwhile you need to do something about your feelings for Tasuki, don't forget there is still a war going on and you know every second counts don't be too late and have regrets." I tried to impart some of my wisdom on her. "Alright I won't thanks Kouran," Suta patted my shoulder. "Yeah I'm going to get some rest now see you in the morning," I said walking into the Palace. Looking back I saw Tasuki come out to see Suta, Okay this I have to see I thought hiding myself from view so I could spy on them, hmm sometimes I'm no better than Miaka I thought.

"Suta here you are, I been lookin' for ya, like all over the place." He said walking up to her.

"Yeah I been sparring with Kouran what's going on?" Suta came over to him. "Well it's about the war, truth is we need to summon Suzaku, we had a mishap when the Seriyuu warriors tricked us into thinking one of their warriors was ours, we did our ceremony and burned out scroll. You can't summon a god without all the warriors and the scroll, so we thought we might not be able to win. We just got word that we can get a Shinzaho, I guess it's something that can help us summon our God without our scroll or something like that. Anyway we gotta go find it somewhere in Hokkan." Tasuki finished. I searched my memories to see if I could remember that, I did their plan backfired when the young warrior was killed when they found him out, if the Seriyuu warriors knew about the Shinzaho, and I could bet my life on it they did they would be searching for it as well. Returning to the scene unfolding before me I could see Suta's face fall after hearing that news. "So you're going to be leaving then?" by her tone, I could tell she was upset.

I was then shocked to see Tasuki touch her face bringing her eyes up to meet his he smiled.

"Well… I was sorta hoping you'd want to come? You don't have to or nothing but I mean I'd like you to.." he stopped talking and stared at her slowly their faces inched closer and closer until… I couldn't believe it they were kissing and kissing, it was to the point where I felt strange watching them turning my back I went to leave.

I only made it a few feet when I saw Chichiri watching the same scene I just turned form, "Chichiri your not spying on them are you?" I asked quietly, "No I came out here to find you no da but wow! I didn't think I'd find this," amusement laced his voice. "You and me both, is it true? Are you guys leaving?" I asked.

"Yeah you heard? It's our only choice our chance to win no da," he stated.

"You do realize you going to be competing against the other warriors for it don't you? I mean if you guys know about it they probably do as well,"

"Yeah I do, which is why I am asking if you will go with us? We could use all the help we can get no da." Chichiri took off his mask "I'd like you to join us on this quest Kouran; you have proven yourself a capable warrior and a friend. I've talked with Hotohori about it already he agreed to have you and Sutashi there would be to our benefit no da." He finished grabbing my hand "it's not going to be easy and it's going to be dangerous so if you say no it's okay," he looked me in the eyes and gave my hand a squeeze to show his sincerity. "Of course I will go with you, I'm honored you asked me", I took my other hand and brought it slowly up to his face touching his scar with my finger tips gently he closed his eye as I traced his scar. The skin beneath it was smooth and soft under my rough hands he let out a breath that told me he was content with this invasion of his personal space, I normally wasn't so bold but I needed to show him my sincerity hopefully I could convey it with this intimate touch.

"I wouldn't risk my life for anyone but you as long as I am able I will use my skills to protect you and your warriors." I vowed to him and I would keep it until I was forced to leave.

"Thanks Kouran, we're leaving tomorrow, so you might want to pack no da," he then opened his eye and touched my face with his hand. "I will protect you as well, he then reached up grabbed my hand that was moments ago tracing his scar and kissed it, "See you in the morning no da," and with that we parted.

I went into my room staring at my bed, I debated on the staying or going as I packed all the beautiful garments that the emperor insisted Suta and I have. Long dresses, hair pieces, jewelry and armor that was nicer than anything I had ever owned. I had figured I would at least travel to the freezing lands of Hokkan before parting I would decide then whether to stay or to leave the so brief comforts of my new found home. sighing I realized I could stay helping them fight until my brother was gone and with a stronger realization then I'd had in a long time I realized that I would fight for these people that they had become a family I'd never known and that I the only reason I'd leave them is because, I know the Seriyuu warriors would kill everyone of them, to get to me and staying would eventually put them all in danger. I fell into bed with all these thoughts but despite them I still fell into a deep sleep. Early morning light was coming in my windows and the birds were singing there happy little songs when I awoke the next morning.

After breaking our fast we went to load up the horses, the horses seemed excited about the long prospect of travel. I however was stricken with sadness as I was still torn about ever leaving if I left now I might cause some small bit of grief but staying I'd make everyone who found out the truth hate me.

I had already come to the conclusion that I would never tell Suta anything about my past or my role in the Seriyuu seven if that prophecy in deed was true. I would leave her in the company of the great people, I had met here and maybe she would watch over Chichiri as I could not. I thought about what my mom said about how she had met my father. She was from a small Island known for their distaste of men. My father happened upon it by accident while his fishing vessel was blown off course. He saw my mom and he was struck by her beauty or so he told me. Apparently after months of my mother trying to ignore him and hiding the fact that she was speaking to a man at all. She realized she loved him and ran away with him leaving the only family she had ever known behind. She once told me she was given to the tribe of women as a baby and she had no idea where she had come from. My mother and father spent many years in happiness even after their first baby was taken a year later they had me. At least they led happy lives I thought sending them a prayer to the heavens to wish them well and to tell them I loved them.

I prayed as I brushed my horse a really beautiful tan horse with a black main and tail, I then once again made up my mind to help the Suzaku seven as much as I could before I was to complete my own future. Maybe if they could summon their God this war would be over and I could be free I was closer then I'd probably ever get and I wasn't giving up so easily.

"Kouran, hey let's do this, come on I can't wait to do some traveling check out some new taverns and kick some ass!" Sutashi smiled at me coming up to great me.

"It's been a while since we traveled like this hasn't it?" I said turning to her.

"Well, yeah but that's why we have to stick together on this besides one nobody kicks as much ass as we do." She raised her fists to show her point.

" Yeah, I guess we really need to do is back these guys up, were not the leaders anymore and they are plenty capable of handling their own, " I chided her

"Kouran I swear sometimes you take the fun out of everything, seriously though how are you doing ? ya know I mean.. about your parents and stuff.. I know I act all tough but you're like my best friend and I need you to know that I'm here for you like always. I won't forget how you helped me that night in the tavern and I won't let you always fight on your own. I just needed to tell you so you know I'm here for you if you need to talk." She finished looking for once serous I took a good look at her she was beautiful her long blue hair framed a perfect face with sharp intelligent deep blue eyes and I could tell she was being her true self around me. This was no front she was showing me, it was her and me best friends and allies I could so easily tell her the truth but then she would leave with me and I didn't want to ruin her life too. When I left she would hate me but it was easier than the alternative which would probably be watching her die.

My mind came back to what she said about the night in the tavern, it was something we never talked about the night we met she got in over her head with a few guys, don't get me wrong Suta is an amazing warrior but she isn't invincible. These guys were tough and they wanted her dead, they probably would have killed her had I not been there, I'd heard them in the ally and got there in time to help her, funny cause she was the one I was looking for in the first place and the only reason I was in that town. It's probably why she agreed to join my army, I'd never know that but I was grateful she did.

"yeah, I'm doing okay I just can believe there gone I just wish I got to say goodbye.." tears started to gather in my eyes but I was too stubborn to shed them "It was like a dream to all of a sudden be fighting for the other side with everything I'd ever known destroyed in seconds, I am okay now. Suta thanks you don't know how much your words mean to me," We then hugged and I felt a few tears fall. The hug was broken by a muffled cough as we broke apart to see Tasuki and Chichiri staring at us.

"Well I didn't mean to interrupt this girl bonding moment" Tasuki said in his usual teasing voice.

"We are ready to head off No da," Chichiri chirped behind him.

"Alright, Suta lets go" I said jumping on to my horse with ease. As we left the walls of the Palace behind I began to feel a little sad about everything I was leaving behind. Traveling was pretty uneventful at night we slept heavily from exhaustion; we took very few breaks in between and made the journey quickly. About one day away from Hokkan as we camped that night under the stars we knew we were close because frost covered the ground everywhere.

That night I was staring in the flames and once again reliving the moment of my parents burning home. I could hear Suta and Tasuki getting along with the others and I was grateful they seem to find common ground.

"Kouran, Hey mind if I sit with you for a while?" I turned to find Chichiri coming over towards me.

"Sure!," I said bringing my knees up and placing my arms around them to keep warm it was freezing here and I hated the cold. Chichiri responded by placing his mantle he always wore around my shoulders.

"It's a bit cold tonight No da the last thing we need is someone sick na no da." He sat down next to me seeming nervous.. No way I thought him nervous that would mean that he… he could.. I pushed the thought away and smiled

"Thank you it is getting chilly tonight." I said turning back to the fire.

"So you never told me.. about the dream you had must have been some dream to have you screaming like that no da." He looked at me his face maskless he had been doing that a lot around me but he also did it when he was being serious. I thought of what to tell him I knew I couldn't tell him the truth I felt ill lying to him.

"Well yeah, it was about my parents kind of like was seeing it happen," Okay so it wasn't the truth but it wasn't a total lie either.

"I'm sorry maybe I shouldn't have brought it up." He placed a hand on my arm, "it's a lot to go though trust me I know, I been though it and the entire time all you can think about it how you could have stopped it. You can't you know, you couldn't anymore then I could stop that flood its fate and you have to face it. It may hurt forever but each day things will get better," he smiled and my heart melted at that moment.

"It already is easier," I admitted bringing my head ever closer to his. "Yeah you just close your eyes and think of happy times you will start healing slowly..no da" he whispered the last part and began to bring his face closer to mine until it was inches from mine own and his lips about to meet mine.. When we heard a giant scream breaking us a apart quickly.

"AHHH a spider its huge Tama- Kins kill it won't you please?" Nuriko's voice echoed in the darkness.

"I'm not wasting my good Chi on a spider get Tasuki to burn it!" Tamahome could be heard yelling back.

"Tasuki?" Nuriko whined. "No, I don't use it for stupid stuff like that," in the next moment the spell to make his fan spout fire was heard.

"Well that was annoying," I blurted "eh I mean umm… well it..s" I stammered trying to find the right words trying not to think of the almost kiss trying to think of anything but the idea of his soft lips on mine.

"Yeah its late No da, I mean I guess I should be going..um goodnight Kouran." Chichiri finished getting up rather quickly and heading toward his own bedroll.

"Um do you want your kesa back?" I asked feeling stupid.

"In the morning no da," He responded turning back to me.

I went to sleep wrapped in Chichiri's kesa breathing in his scent so I would remember it as long as I lived, I slept well despite it being cold and I am pretty sure Suta kicked me in the head a few times.

When I woke up the next day I felt so good until the realization of my feelings once again hit me I decided before I left I would tell Chichiri everything and if he hated me forever so be it a least I was truthful to him when I couldn't be to anyone else. As soon as I rolled away from my bed roll I realized two things one it was getting really cold in the forest and two I was kidding myself to think that I would be okay, but then again I was pretty good a lying to myself I'd been doing it for years.

Traveling one more day led us to a small village; there we met with the town elder who gave us a map to the cave where the Shinzaho could be found. We reached Tokuuran a huge town inside Hokkan shortly after and decided Nature was great but we finally needed a tavern and a warm place to stay. We all needed one night of a good meal and drink which is how I found myself sitting at the bar with Nuriko and her I mean him making us Nuriko specials his drink of choice.

"This is pretty good, what's in it?" I asked. Him he was dressed for once like a man, he even cut his long purple hair short he was pretty handsome.

"Ah that Kouran is my special secret, you know when I was a concubine my name was Kourin, funny huh?" He said smiling at me.

"Yeah, is that how you came to the palace?" I asked I had to admit that's a pretty great story if they really thought she was a women and not only a warrior she was also a he, I couldn't make this stuff up.

"Yup, then they sorta found me out, I guess it's time to be a man for a while I can protect my priestess this way, and it's nice to be who I truly am for once." He said. I was once again surprised at these warriors love for their priestess a love I was beginning to share as I watch Miaka with Suta and Tasuki they were playing a game of some sort.


	5. Chapter 5

The next morning we divided up to find that cave, Nuriko and a few of the others took the first shift when they got to cold, they would come for the next and if they found something Chiriko thought of letting off fireworks so we could join them. It was a pretty smart idea but he was a genius of a child so it didn't surprise me.

I had a bad feeling that day and only looking back on it I wished I would have told someone. We saw the fireworks go up and we rushed to get there but it was too late. There lying in the snow was Nuriko covered in blood, he was attacked by an animal and I knew without seeing who it was, my brother did this I could sense his presentence like it was my own. The warriors stood around Nuriko crying, I looked over the body of the beautiful man who ever lived an overwhelming wave of despair came over the warriors as the realization of the fact that we had lost one of our own. Mitsukake had restored his beauty although; he could not restore his life. Looking at him in his former glory we could not help but feel helpless because with his last remaining strength he was able to move the giant boulder that was blacking the way into the cave to which it was rumored the object of power was hidden.

All at once I felt a pull of power stronger than anything I'd ever felt before in one moment I knew where my brother was, whipping my head around crystal tears turning to ice on my face in the cold wind. I broke into a run everyone just looked at me as I ran. Swatting branches as I ran though the deep snow I felt the pull on my brother's life force. I came upon a clearing and saw a large gray wolf lying in the bloody snow. I ran to him touched his soft fur I could feel his breathing heavy and fast he was dying, I could feel his demishing life force as I felt mine grow stronger. As tears began to fall from my face I could see gashes in his side and scars covered his face and above his eye. I knew that they had beaten him but I never dreamed it was this bad. Now it was my turn it was coming true I was getting his power he was dying and he had taken a Suzaku Warrior with him. I began to cry harder I felt a small warmth on the palm of my hand as Ashitare licked my hand. He looked at me his eyes were so human I was amazed he didn't talk to me right then. He lay his head in my lap closed his eyes and I felt the last breath leave his body.

I buried my head into his soft fur and felt the warmth of his power seep into me it felt like the times I had felt his power only it was stronger than anything I had felt before. I heard clearly in my head "Thank you sister now it is your turn," it was haunting. As he said it my body glowed with the blue light and the power was immense as it went into me. I Screamed and broke into heaving sobs for the life I was going to lose and for my brother who had known such torment in his brief life and for the million unfair things in life I don't know how long I was there but my tears began to freeze. "I'm sorry my bother I am so sorry," I said to him pulling myself together long enough to break away from him.  
>.<p>

"Kouran, Where are you?" Chichiri yelled.

"Kouran where the hell are you?" Suta's voice chimed in.

I wiped the tears and went to find them "I found him, the one who killed Nuriko he is dead," I led them to my brother, "he was beaten probably didn't know what he was doing." I tried to give them a reason an excuse so maybe we could show him some kindness by at least doing something proper with his body.

"I think we could at least burn his body." I said sadly

" What? Why the hell would ya do that you still on the other side?" Tasuki had dried tears on his face, I could tell he had been crying very hard no wonder he blew up on me. What reasons could I give it was an odd request to burn ones enemy. My head perked up,

"I want to because; I am the one who ended his life." Everyone froze and took in deep breaths including Suta who was giving me a look that said really you're kidding.

"Without a scratch on you how did you manage that one?" Tasuki inquired.

"I said I only finished him off he was rather beat up by Nuriko, I just let him die in peace as Nuriko had done." I put my head down lying to them was much harder than it should have been.

"Let's burn the body Tasuki it would be the right thing to do no da." Chichiri offered.

"Fine!" Tasuki walked into the clearing said the magic words and I could feel heat coming from at area of the forest.

"We better leave before someone comes looking for him," I said wanting to leave as quickly as possible.

We left beaten down and depressed we had to regroup, before going into that cave or we might not make it out. We decided to go back to the cave in the morning. I was leaving tonight I wasn't going to be able to help them anymore it was clear the warriors of Seriyuu we're here but they didn't have a map it that much was clear or they wouldn't have sent my bother out to hunt the warriors down. Nakago would have done it himself and with my brother dead they wouldn't be able to find the cave until it was light.

I needed to leave to find them and to get them to leave without getting their hands on the Shinzaho.

"Strange request you had back there, are you alright? You seem different Kouran," Suta came up to me while I was eating at the tavern my last meal with them all I thought sadly.

"I'm fine Suta, just upset about Nuriko, and I just felt right burning that body, I don't know why." I lied.

"Well whatever ,I think it was a horrible thing to ask Tasuki to do, You know how close he was to Nuriko how dare you ask him to Burn the body of a filthy creature who killed him even if you did finish him off," She spat at me, She was seriously mad. Oh well I thought she would be much madder once tomorrow rolled around so I guess right now doesn't matter.

"Fine I was wrong I'm sorry now are you done making me feel like shit or would you like to keep going, you could talk about how maybe I should have cut the off his damn head and mounted on my wall if you want." I couldn't help it I was pissed she had no idea who she was talking to anymore.

"Fine Kouran, Just drop it." She turned away to go back to Tasuki who wasn't handling the death of his friend very well. Chichiri was praying somewhere probably in his room, it was time to go.

I headed up to my room to pack my few things and get out of here as soon as I could. In no time I was heading down the hallway to leave with a small bag and my sword.

Unfortunately I ran into Chichiri we bumped heads.

"Ouch that hurt! no da"

" Chichiri I stammered" rubbing my forehead.

"Are you leaving Kouran?" he asked seeing my bag, " What the hell is going on you better start explaining," he was getting angry and he ripped off his mask with a force I'd never seen before. Sighing I set my bag down, "let's go talk okay?" I said hoping he would understand once I told him my story.

Wordlessly he led me to his room and gestured for me to sit.

"Okay, before you scream and yell and hate me please just hear me out. First you have to know, If I knew the prophecy was true I wouldn't have came with you. Short story the wolf, Seriyuu warrior was my brother, he and I share powers, it was said when he died I'd become the new warrior I didn't believe it I never wanted that, I didn't know until he died today and the mark appeared the mark that was once his the mark of the tail. It did and now I'm a full warrior of Seriyuu I can't fight this anymore then you could fight it when you were chosen. But I never lied to you Chichiri I wanted to protect you and I vowed I would, now I am by leaving they will kill you and everyone else to get to me you know they will!" I finished tears now running down my face.

"Kouran, you lied to me, I don't know why you didn't say anything before how could you look at my face every day and lie?" he looked at me and my heart broke his faith in me was shattered beyond repair and it killed everything inside me.

"I never lied to you; everything I'd ever said to you was true I only left out bits of my past." I said it came out in a sob.

"But I care about you! I do and you took that trust I had and destroyed it!" Chichiri stood up grabbing me hard and forced me to look at him. " Fine Kouran if you're so ready to leave I'll help you," He said grabbing me by my arm and yanking me roughly into his Kasa I fell out in a area I wasn't familiar with and Hit in ground hard, he came down softly beside me. Grabbing me and pulling me to my feet and forcing me to look at his angry gaze.

"Your very good at being a spy, keeping me distracted the entire time and coming over to our side so you could get a first hand view of Konan's defenses. I wouldn't have been able to come up with a better plan then that!" He yelled at my face, his pain was apparent but he was starting to piss me off.

"Yeah, Okay all of it was a big plan to get closer to Konan, and my parents yeah, I set them up to die all for some stupid war! Do you really think all of that was a set up, that I'd let my parents die? That all that pain wasn't real? How dare you say that to me you're making my loss in to something it's not! You know I just got these powers you can sense that so how you can sit there and say that I made up everything to win this war! When they already tried this Stupid Plan with someone else I REALLY THOUGHT YOU WERE SMARTER THEN THAT!" I Screamed in his face, tears of rage were pouring out of my eyes but I didn't care he was so mad at me why not tell him how I felt at that moment. Though my words seem to sink in and he loosened his tight hold on my arm a bit.

"Okay fine, maybe the whole thing wasn't a set up, but you knew this could happen and still you kept it from me and I have to know, was everything you told me a lie? You vowed to fight for me and now you're telling me you have to leave and that you're on the other side! So just where the hell do your loyalties lie?" His face was inches away from mine and the cold look in his eye sent chills down my spine.

"NONE OF IT WAS A LIE!" I screamed at him and then regaining my composer I continued " I vowed to fight for you and I did, I never expected to feel like this and How was I to know some stupid story was going to come true and take away the only source of comfort I'd ever felt in my life. Going away to be something I'm not, to a place I hate and turned my back on and none of it matters, because the only thing I am going to be missing when it's all said and done is..you.. Because you're the one who showed me that I could be more than just a killer and that's something I never thought I would be. So believe what you want then.." I trailed off this was becoming too hard and it was horribly painful.

" But you still need to make a choice, right or wrong whatever you have done you have a chance to change it. Don't you see you have a choice in this? Are you capable of making your own choices at all?" He looked at me his anger was fading and turning to despair.

"No, it's not a choice, if I stay they will come for me, I can already feel the pull of their power and you know what that's like." I said already feeling defeated, if he couldn't understand well I couldn't make him.

"You can think that all you wish, but your wrong. You can fight it and it's your life, is it so meaningless to you that you can't do with it as you please?" Chichiri asked and I wanted to believe that more than anything, but he didn't know what the other warriors were capable of how they would tear through them and destroy every bit of hope Konan ever had.

"Then I am wrong then," I said putting my head down, I could no longer look into his face.

"Once you make your decision.. I won't stop you." He said, I looked at him then, he had tears in his eye and I wondered briefly if things had been different and these differences between us were not so vast if we might have actually found love. It didn't matter now, maybe none of it ever did because I knew the choice I was going to make was right and if he didn't well maybe when he was still alive he'd thank me someday.

"I wish things were different, but this is a choice I have to make, right or wrong it's my fate," Yes I had made my choice and it crushed every dream I'd ever had.

Then I guess this is goodbye Kouran." Chichiri said he touched my face for a moment and looked at me with a longing that was so raw, I could almost feel it. In moments the warmth of his body was gone and I was standing in the cold streets alone.

That was when it all came crashing down around me in waves, I lost everything in moments again... this was becoming the story of my life I thought sadly. If I was making the wrong choice then I was the fool, but I wasn't going to see my friends die if I could help it. Hopefully Suta would understand if not she would hate me but at least she would be alive. I had no idea what the future held for me at that moment. What had I done? Was I really that wrong to try and save them or was I really just cursed by a fate I couldn't control? I had no answers only a small bit of hope that I wasn't throwing my life away for no reason. All thoughts a side I began walking towards that strong pull of life forces I had been feeling since my brother had died. I had to control myself from running back to my true friends and begging Chichiri for his forgiveness but I knew I had to be stronger then that to do so, would be sealing their demise. No I could do this because of the love I felt for them was real and I needed them to be safe more then I could ever realize. I would become a warrior I would follow my birth rite and do what I could to bring peace to Kutoh, if I failed well at least I made the best choice I could. Still the urge to go back to them was so strong it overwhelmed me and I had to yell at myself more than once to quell the inner demons who wanted me to be selfish for once.

I resigned myself to my fate once I saw their camp, little tents all around a huge tent that I assumed was Nakago's a guard let me by when I told him who I was, he asked me to show him the symbol, I agreed damn pervert it had to be on my thigh didn't it. I let it show for the first time since I gotten it, it was odd and I just wanted it to be over. Finally he let me in I gave him the dirtiest look I could muster and walked thought the tent flaps to find Nakago sitting at a table inside.

"Kouran, so you finally decided to join us, I am guessing your brother dying had little to do with your sudden change of heart" He smirked his awful smile and I wanted to puke.

"I am not going to punish you Kouran, your back now and that's all that matters, still you need to fit the part of being a warrior and if I find your loyalties lie with anyone other than us. Then I will kill you myself, do we have an understanding?" His cold words shot though my veins like ice, I had no doubt he would kill me if he had the chance and the walls I had so carefully crafted around my heart, which were crumbling went back up in an instant.

"Yes of Course, I am back in the service of Seriyuu," I bowed, being the obedient little soldier I'd always been and knowing my fate was sealed from this moment on.

"Good, then you need to find Soi and get your armor befitting a warrior, that Konan armor your wearing is making me sick." He finished partially kicking me out of his tent. I was happy to be gone from there and I left gladly, I asked that bastard Guard where I might find this Soi and he led me to a tent not far away.

Soi was in her tent when I arrived, she was sitting on her makeshift bed wearing robes of the finest silk her long reddish hair was down and framed her almost red eyes.

"Kouran, I knew you we're coming I felt your brother die, so I had the servants ready this for you." She gestured to a pile of armor on the floor with a brand new sword on top of it.

"Thanks, I reached to pick them up your tent is next to mine you better get some rest you're going to need it." She stated. "There are sleeping garments in there as well."

"I will see you in the morning, you're going to be training with me, so I am sure we will see a lot of each other in the future." She stated.

I nodded and took the pile of clothes leaving to find my own tent. I just wanted to go to sleep this had been one of the worst days of my life at least when my parents died I had Chichiri who was then a stranger but still he was comfort. I had no one here and no idea what I was doing. I dressed in the garments and lied down thinking about all I had lost; I had to be one of them now there were no other options, if I had tried to do anything to save my friends I would be killed that much I was sure of. I would change who I was at this moment and go back to being the soulless killer I knew myself to be, Kouran that was anything, but was over and with her went the love for a masked monk she'd never seen again. I fell asleep soon after my raging emotions couldn't even keep me awake anymore.


	6. Chapter 6

In the morning I awoke and putting on the armor they had given me, a teal blue dress, with a dark skirt which was actually armor and a very heavy rope tied it on, armor for my shoulders and chest. The new sword was perfect and it was beautiful. Though none of this made me feel any better and word was before I even got up that we had stolen the Shinzaho from the other warriors. My heart fell into despair I really was going to be with these warriors for the rest of my life. Soon after we headed back to the capital I was given a room in the Palace that was nice but not any nicer than the one I was given in Konan. The days bled into one another we were still waiting for Yui to be our Priestess and we couldn't do the summoning without her.

Personally I didn't mind Yui most of the time but she could be annoying and spoiled. Nakago knew what she met for us so he would do anything for her the others avoided her like the plague except Suboshi who followed His Lady Yui around like some sick puppy. Yui was also apparently in love with Tamahome which further kept her from liking Miaka but I guess they were best friends back in their word. It was sad and made me think about how I'd lost Suta the only friend I had for most of my life she probably hated me now. The worst part however was seeing Tomo I knew he killed my parents or allowed them to die either way he made me sick and I avoided him as much as I could. Two months I'd been here were among the worst in my life, there were things these warriors did that were nothing like Konan, we killed for sport if you failed you died, and there was nothing you could do about it. I'd killed many people on the battlefield but Nakago would kill simply because he could. Also I had to deal with out Emperor who would bring in women each week to join the harem. It made me sick and the way he looked at me with desire made me shudder. Never the less, I just tried to mind my own business and train. Actually that was all I normally did was train, that way I didn't have to think when I am fighting that's the only thought that's crossing my mind and when I lose? Well that just makes me try harder.

Anyway it was one normal day like this when, I bumped into someone quite unexpected, I looking up to my utter surprise it was Tamahome a warrior from Konan. He just continued to walk into Yui's chambers this was strange, could Tamahome playing both sides? and why didn't he recognize me? Looking into the open door I could see him hugging her, I was filled with instant anger and rage at the sight of this, how could he do this to Miaka? I thought to myself this couldn't be, I made a choice to find out what was going on so I waited and followed him after he left Yui's room.

"Tamahome!" I yelled after him running to catch up to him,

"Sorry, what can I do for you? Do I know you?" He looked at me, his expression vacant, his eyes were dulled almost to the point of black and I felt something was very wrong.

"Oh don't play dumb with me! You know who I am!" I said getting frustrated with him.

"Right, I don't have time for games little girl I have skills to sharpen" it was all he said and he turned and strolled away folding his hands above his head like he has not a care in the world..

Okay, just what the hell was going on, I reflected on it living the moment over and over again until I was almost sure of what was going on he was on our side, the blackness of his eyes and him hugging Yui!. No.. I thought surely she wasn't this cruel it would be a way to get him for herself but still I didn't trust my own judgment so I went to the only person I could ask Soi, only she could be the reason behind what I thought was happening to Tamahome.

Upon entering her room I found Soi, She normally used this time to work on her potions Soi was pretty good at making poisons and ointments, where she picked up this skill I could not say but she has it and Nakago used it a lot as he used her other skills raising Ki though a sexual encounter. I had come to find out about her past and how she got here. Being sold to a brothel at the age of 10 , becoming of age she was then sold to her first customer, terrified of what was going to happen, she ran away. The man ran after her in order to get what he paid for he was about to as well, but a strong blond warlord stopped him, that man was Nakago. He brought her to the Palace as a servant but soon realized she was a celestial warrior like him, Maybe it was because he saved her or maybe there were other reasons but whatever they were Soi was in love with Nakago, and she showed this by being utterly devoted to him she would do anything he asked without question which was sad to me because I was pretty Nakago could careless if she lived or died.

"Soi, Can I ask you something?" I questioned her as she looked up from what she was doing.

"What is it Kouran, wait let me guess I know why you're here, you wish to know what's going on with Tamahome, don't you?" She always got right to the point.

"Did you make it?" I accused her.

"Nakago asked me too, I never refuse him,"

"I got that much," I remembered I who I was I couldn't sound concerned even if I hab been.

"Well I had to admit it's something I wouldn't have thought of now they're missing two Warriors, don't we just have the upper hand in all this," I said smugly.

"We're going to win regardless, this is just a away to give Yui what she wants and make her our Priestess." Soi stated. I knew this was her motivation but I couldn't believe Yui knew what she was doing.

"I see well be that as it may, we're still taking away one of their stronger warriors" with that I bid her a farewell I decided to have a word with our priestess.

I found Yui in her usual place sitting on her bed after her royal bath she was wearing a long shirt of some kind and nothing else she looked calm and content for once.

"Yui," She looked up at me from the book she was reading.

"Yes, Kouran do you wish to speak to me?" She demanded.

"So what did you do to Tamahome?" If she didn't know then maybe I could enlighten her if she did then she was just as cruel as I thought her to be.

"I just made him mine," Her eyes were cold.

"Do you hate your best friend that much?" She was playing childish games in an adult world and she had no idea what she was doing.

"I gave him something to forget her! He is mine now, Miaka can't take everything from me she can't! it's not fair!" She yelled like a small spoiled child, she didn't know pain not really, and she wasn't going to get sympathy from me.

"Alright listen to me. **Kuduko** isn't just some love drug, you have changed him into something else making him forget his life, his values and everything it will effectively destroy his mind nothing can stop it and nothing can bring him back from it. He is yours alright and he will never be the same again. I hope making him believe he loves you is worth all of that. Did you know that only a few people in the world can make it? And it is band in all countries. By the God's Yui, if you really loved him you wouldn't have done this." I finished as she began to get a terrified look in her eyes.

"Nakago, didn't tell me all that, he said it would make him forget her," Her shoulders sunk in defeat.

"Well of course he didn't, he wants to win this no matter what the cost and you, you're so wrapped up in your pain you fail to see others." I scolded her as if she was an insolent child and not our soon to be priestess.

"Oh yeah, Well then What about you Kouran, you left everyone when you came here, Chichiri did you know that that destroyed him! Apparently he isn't the same since you left. Did you even care about him? My god you preach to me about all this stuff yet you are the one who knows nothing and your no better than me Kouran!" She screamed as she began to sob, I sat there dumbfounded she might as well slapped me across my face for all the shock I was feeling. I had firstly no idea how she knew any of this, nore did I care because she just threw it right in my face and I couldn't say anything to deny it.

"How do you know any of this? You couldn't possibly know about Chichiri or any of it You haven't a clue what you're talking about and furthermore this has nothing to do with Tamahome!" I screamed back in her face. Maybe I should have watched my tongue because she was our soon to be Priestess and our duty was to make her happy, but I couldn't care less because in my heart I knew she was right and that thought made me seethe.

"I do know Tamahome came to get me, and he used you as an example. He said Miaka loved me and she wanted me to come back. He also said you changed Chichiri and he wasn't the same without you he was changed, angry and bitter and he didn't want that fate for me they wanted me with them and happy. But I guess I am no better then you," She spat, "I won't forgive Miaka, ever for taking my life away from me and now I have taken the one who means the most to her." She finished.

I couldn't fight with her anymore, so I changed him? I thought, back into what he was before starting to heal, and back to masking his emotions behind an actual mask. Great, so I ruined two lives now I was so mad and I could feel tears threatening to fall, but I wouldn't shed them, I couldn't show weakness anymore and especially not in front of Yui after she had demolished me like that. I turned my back on her and slammed the door behind me. Things just couldn't be like that I had no choice; it was destiny I couldn't deny it or hide from it. Did that make me weak that I didn't try something else to block my fate from being written?

I began walking back to my room when I heard commotion in one of the other rooms it sounded like arguing over the sweet sound of a music box. Curiously I began towards the sound only to hear an audible pop coming from the other corroder. I spun around and headed the direction of the popping sound, running face first into something it was a bearer of some kind and behind it was someone I never thought I would see again. Chichiri stood looking at me even his mask held a shocked look shaking his head. He walked thought the bearer grabbed my arm and said

"Kouran I need to find Tamahome, Miaka went looking for him and she could get into trouble no da." I looked at him hiding the disappointment that he didn't come for me in my eyes, It's impossible but I still wanted him to care, Yui was right I was a cruel as she.

"Chichiri there is something I need to tell you Tamahome you know is gone. Yui gave him Kuduko! I am really sorry, I think you need to get Miaka out of here right away as he thinks himself to be one of us and could kill her." I touched his shoulder in a comforting gesture.

"I have Tasuki looking for her right away."

"Then that means..." I trailed off

"No Suta isn't here she is too irrational for this kind of mission and besides if she found you she said she would kill you." As painful as it was to hear I knew he was right.

"She is just angry she will get over it in time," He read my thoughts comforting me the best way he knew how.

"Again I am sorry.. for everything this didn't go how I planned." I said I couldn't help myself I reached up an touched his hair. To my utter surprise he not only let me but put his hands up to his face and removed his mask. Then taking my hand he placed it on his cheek, I touched his cheek for the briefest moments then I touched his scar running my fingers along its path as if to tell him the pain would heal one day. He then touched my face his touch was warm and inviting he scent was that of the spring rain and the earth.

"It's looks as though you made your choice well, you were probably right to leave, the others would have came from you and killed everyone that stood in their path. Only now do I see the choice you made was the only way you could stop them and I have to thank you for it." Chichiri admitted placing both hands on my face and pulling me into a small kiss. He pull away only briefly his eye looking straight into mine. I smiled as a tear rolled down my cheek. I felt the soft warmth of his lips against mine for a brief second, we shared a look and then his lips crashed into mine, my emotions poured into him and his into me our mouths opening to let the other in as his tongue slid against mine inhaling his very breath.

I could feel his power wash over me as mine begin to surround us, his red Chi meeting my blue as our life forces melding into each other. We were both feeling the power we held consume us, probably because two warriors of opposite sides never came together before and it was overwhelming. Chichiri was the first to break the kiss that felt like it mingled our souls for those moments of bliss where I had no other thought then him, he gently pulled away and smiled.

"I want you to know, should this war end I would welcome you back." He gave me once last tender kiss and he was gone. I stood there in utter shock as I heard the screaming in the next room get louder.

Once I entered the room I found Miaka and Tamahome, Seeing him raise a weapon in his hand and bringing it down hard on her arm. She screamed in pain, and slid down the wall in sobs. I had to do something.

"Enough," I sternly stood my ground.

"Kouran!" Was Miaka's reply she looked surprised to see me despite the obvious pain she was in.

"Leave her Tamahome I will take care of this," I gently took her arm helping her up I walked her out of the room. He looked shocked but gave up and ran off to find something else to do.

"Why?" She looked at me with lost eyes, blood was running down her arm and I quickly stopped to rip off to bottom of my skirt and bandage up her arm with it.

"Tamahome isn't your Tamahome anymore he had been given Koduko it has erased all his memories. I am sorry, but there is no cure and he will never be the Tamahome you fell in love with." I fished tying the makeshift bandage around her arm as she began to sob uncontrollably. I hugged her "You need to find Chichiri and let him get you out of here, please Miaka leave before you get killed." She numbly nodded as I looked for Chichiri, I could sense him near the eastern yard, I took Miaka there as fast as I could when I felt Nakago's Chi in the hall ahead of me crap. I was about to look for a place to hide when Chichiri popped up and I practically threw Miaka at him he was gone as fast as he came and I flashed in to a wolf and ran as far as I could away from Nakago.

I soon found Tasuki fighting Tamahome, Nakago was watching I could sense his strong powers anywhere. In my wolf form, I could sense Chichiri in a bush not too far away. Nakago was holding Chichiri's Chi so he couldn't use his powers. I was so scared for him I would not let him die like this clutching are only hope for a peaceful world the Priestess if Yui failed which she probably would or if those who summoned her had ill wishes then our world would never be peaceful. So I couldn't let Miaka die.

Tamahome gave Tasuki blow after blow and the air was filled with the overpowering smell of blood. Tasuki may have been strong but he was no match for Tamahome under the Koduko influence. I heard the sounds of bones snapping and flesh hitting flesh soon Tasuki was on the ground, if this went on he would die. I heard Miaka's muffled screams and guessed Chichiri must have held on to her mouth tightly as to not give away their location. I could sense Chichiri's strong desire to use his powers, I tried not to interfere but I couldn't let Tasuki die I knew it would break Sutashi. I flashed in to my body and brought my hand up releasing my own power and blocking Nakago's it was all Chichiri needed barely seconds to grab Miaka, Tasuki and teleport in his Kasa to safety. I heard Nakago scream and I believed I would be severely beaten for this. I looked at Tamahome he had tears streaming down his face I could only think that maybe their love was stronger than the Kuduko that he was given.

Days went by and I never got a summons from Nakago maybe he didn't know it was me or he was buying his time either way. I was still frightened of what he could do to me should he find out. I was torn upside with my emotions pouring out of me, sitting at dinner with the man who killed my mother was getting to be to much for me. I hardly was able to eat but I would force myself as not to draw any attention to me. I was waking up at night and reliving there deaths in my head, as well as a nightmare I kept having of Chichiri dying. Finally after all this it was just becoming to be too much for me to handle anymore.

I went to see Soi one afternoon she was busy dressing in her armor for training.

"Is there any way to lessen the effects of Kuduko?" I asked her Tamahome had left to kill the Emperor of Konan but we had not heard of him being killed, nor any word from him either, so I could only assume he was back where he belonged. If there love was strong enough to break the drug either that or he was killed or taking prisoner but our spy's reveled nothing.

"What do you mean like forget just years, rather than a life time? Or just numbing you so you don't care?" She asked me turning to face me; she looked at me narrowing her eyes.

"Just something to make me not care" I stated simply I was desperate, I felt too much and I just wanted it to stop.

."Well Kouran, I wouldn't suggest anything, to get rid of your memories but if you think your loyalty might falter then well I wouldn't be opposed to helping you a bit." She gave an evil smile, before taking out from a shelf a small bag.

"I made it myself it's from Kuduko but it's not as strong or as deadly, it will help you feel less, you will still have the memories but the pain will die. Take a pinch before bed with your tea and soon you won't care anymore." She placed the pouch into my hands.

"It's your choice rather you do this or not, make it wisely." She said walking though the door.

I made my choice taking my first taste of freedom that night. I still felt things for a while but as I took the potion I began caring less and less. In result I was able to focus on my training and soon became one of the warriors not to be crossed with on the battlefield.

For the first time in my life I was free from feeling well anything at all. I could and did fight in a way I'd never fought before killing my way though men and not caring about the blood anymore, unless it splashed into my eyes and I couldn't see. I led a small army on a mission to destroy, some up risers in another part of our Country. Those boys, who were barely old enough to be men, were slaughtered because they tried to stand up for themselves. If I had any care that I just destroyed a whole town It didn't matter because I wasn't feeling anything. When I arrived a few days later back at the Palace, Nakago was please with my progress.

I didn't care and shrugged him off, going to do some training with my men; they were weak and needed to be hardened. I was in charge of them and pushing them to their limits when Nakago came up to me.

"Kouran, you have done well, beyond my expectations and the Emperor's himself. I am sure putting you on the front lines of the next battle won't be too big of a problem for you?" He said watching my men, they were training. "You have whipped these men, into soldiers Kutoh can be proud of, and destroyed those who were uprising. I am happy with your success." It was all he said, as he walked off his blue cape flying behind him.

Giving up on these useless soldiers, I went back to my room looking for the pouch of tea Soi had made for me and realizing to my horror it was gone. "Damn it" I yelled taking my tea pot and throwing it at the wall it smashed in to a thousand pieces and I felt better. I took off in search of Soi, I busted into her room demanding she give me more.

"No!" Soi stated simply.

"What? Why? What harm does it do to you?" I slammed my fist down on the table next to her.

"You have come to rely on it, you're not the same person, and by the God's Kouran its only been a month I heard about what you did to those up risers." She rattled off as if she were talking to herself.

"So what, they should know better than trying to stand up and undermining our ability to control them. "They got what any good solider would have given them." I said it was a fact and the other armies would have done much worse.

"They were boys, and you killed them, now I may be a warrior but you weren't that hardened when you came here and there's only one reason for it. So its done get over Kouran, your going to feel and be you again. You're acting like some kind of addict." She finished dismissing me as if she still had any control over me at all.

"I need it you wouldn't want my loyalty slipping again would you." I said touching my dagger at my side.

"You! How dare you!" She got up and touched me with her power it was electricity and it sent me flying into her bookshelf sending everything flying as my body collided with the hard surface. It hurt but not as much as her next words.

"You're not getting anymore Kouran EVER! You were one of the only good things left around here and had I known you would be so weak against its influence, I wouldn't have given it to you in the first place." She scolded me I didn't see her angry very often but she was very frightening. "Now leave this room and never ask me for it again!" She raged, her hand flying to the door.

I left defeated, if I thought it going to be was hard getting the feelings back, not having the drug was much worse. wasn't as if it was addictive Soi assured me it was not, but the shear pain of feeling again after all that I did under its influence was enough to cause me to wake up at night shaking and sweating, I relived the moments when I tortured men for information and killed without mercy even if they begged it caused me to vomit. Finally after about a week or so of this, I made up my mind that I was stronger than that and despite what I did I couldn't go back and change it now. Besides who was I kidding, I still had my feelings for Chichiri and the others. It only made in the now moments of killing easier, in the long run it made everything worst.


	7. Chapter 7

A week later I began to sort thought the feelings of remorse and guilt that were so easily taken away with the use of the drug when Nakago came to find me to bring me a gift. It turned out to be a sword.

"It was made in Siryuu, the lightest metals, the best power and its balance to suite only you." He handed me a wrapped bundle.

I opened it, it was everything he said it would be, I could fight with just about anything but my sword was my weapon of choice. When I couldn't use it excelled in hand to hand combat. I could kill either way I thought to myself but I took the gift because it wasn't often Nakago gave you anything. It was even less when he was nice about it. Thanking him for the gift I took it and went to apologize to Soi. Thankfully she blew me off saying she was glad I felt better because barely anyone had seen me for a week. Leaving her room I stumbled across Suboshi he was he was covered in dried blood, it was on his face and matted his hair down in an odd angle and he looked more insane than usual.

"Kouran, I have beaten your wonderful friends at last!" He smiled it was horrible and the bloody weapon he was holding was making me nervous.

"What are you talking about? " I demanded, they weren't my friends anymore and I was getting sick of people acting like I wasn't loyal.

" I killed them all!" He whispered. Ok now I was getting worried, if he had killed them.. I couldn't finish the thought.

"Just who did you kill?" I asked terrified of the answer.

"Tamahome's family their all dead!" I looked at him in utter shock I had heard of his family all little brothers and sisters his elderly father who took care of them all. I began to back away, they were all kids, I knew we were cruel but I couldn't believe this.

"Children? Little Kids? Why? What is the purpose of this?" I asked him shocked he would be bragging about killing children but then again nothing surprised me anymore.

"It was fun, I enjoy killing the helpless, I reach them and their weakest like when there sleeping.." He went on " that when I do my best work," He continued his rant as I saw clearly in my head my parents bodies, the strange wounds left on them all that blood.. I faltered back.. The realization smashed into me.. Faster than I could control.

"You!..It was you who killed them, YOU KILLED MY FAMILY!" I screamed at him enraged he would be so bold as to basically tell me this, the look on his face told me all I needed to know.

"No I killed your mother!"

"You will Die for this," I ran at him grabbing his throat with my hands, his weapons lay at his feet useless while he struggled to breathe, I backed him into the wall squeezing with a small bit a pleasure as I watched his face turn a nice shade of blue.

Suddenly I was hit from behind with a huge blast In knocked me into Suboshi releasing my hold on him I was pushed away from him with force and ended up slamming into a huge gaudy statue down the huge hallway my back broke it in half and I couldn't breathe.

"KOURAN! WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE YOU DOING" a loud booming voice made me shudder I was just blasted with Nakago's Chi I was lucky to be alive. He had to have gone easy on me or I'd be dead right now I thought.

"You should know better than this you're going to be whipped for your betrayal and trying to kill a fellow warrior. Yui has a agreed finally to be our Priestess the summoning will commence in 3 days. And you will need it to give you time to recover." He looked down at me with a look a malice, as he grabbed me from the place I fell, not caring if I could walk or not he pulled me over his shoulder. As he headed down to the dungeons, a place I'd heard of but never wanted to see but I was going to see it and probably gain the whole experience. Nakago took me to a small room and roughly pulled my robe off, undressing me, I was horrified at what could happen in that moment and I wanted to die of humiliation. He didn't seem to care about me standing there naked and freezing in the cold stone room. He grabbed my hands and tied them above my head tightly, the circulation getting cut off .My now frozen body was awaiting the pain I would soon be subjected too. I waited for the first whip to hit my skin I was frantically trying to take my mind off the impending agony. When the first one cracked against my back I screamed the pain wasn't anything I'd imagined and the screaming seemed to be, what he wanted and with then next three, I could feel the blood rush down my back and legs as bolts of white hot pain unlike anything I'd felt before spread out from the lacerations lining my back.. I thought briefly about how my brother endured this most of his life, and I resolved myself to take the pain in his place. By the last of the lashes- only three more- the pain began to fade to a numbing throb. I knew that my back was raw and bleeding and the numbness was almost a blessing by now

"Maybe next time you will think before you act Kouran." He cut me down with his blade and threw me my robe.

I stumbled back to my room from the dungeons, I had never been in more pain before in my life. I even hurt to breathe I was pretty sure I bruised a rib or two being hit with that blast. Not to mention my wounds on my back those that were still bleeding. I felt dizzy and light headed an upon finding my way to my room I all but fell into my bed breaking down into sobs. In the morning I awoke to find Soi sitting next to me she was tending to the broken skin on my back.

"I did this for your brother only too often, I suppose it is fitting that I should be sitting here doing the same for you, it's going to take time to heal and you know the battle with Konan starts tomorrow their going to try to stop the summoning there also going to fail." She said only confirming what I already knew I had to get Chichiri to retreat or they would all die.

"They have an encampment right outside the city I'm not sure why we don't just destroy them all in one huge swoop but I guess Nakago has other plans, Kouran you should have stayed away from Suboshi you had to know one of them killed your parents." She rubbed some ointment on my wounds. I began to plan on leaving to talk to Chichiri in my head, the next night I would see him again I had two days until the summoning. I would go tomorrow night as a wolf I shouldn't have a problem. The next day I stayed in bed and tried to heal as fast as I could finally the night before the summoning came and turning myself into a wolf I left the Kutoh palace. It was rather simple as a wolf I could sneak around fairly easy and it wasn't before long I came upon Konan's encampment I sniffed out Chichiri's scent and let myself into his tent to wait for him.

When he finally came in I'd turn into myself again I couldn't keep the wolf form as long as I'd wish so I thought I'd play it safe and save my power for when I needed it. Chichiri came in holding a candle he almost dropped it when he saw me.

"Kouran? What are you doing here?" He whispered daring not to be loud he held a shocked look on his maskless face.

"I need to talk to you, the summoning is tomorrow, you can't stop it and you would be foolish to try." I was still talking telling him all the ways they would fail should they try but he wasn't listening he just came over to me and put his arms around me. I tensed in pain and moaned, damn it. I didn't want him to know that I was hurt. It would just cause him to worry...and he was. The wounds were too raw for me to conceal the pain his touch caused and the look in his eye as he backed away revealed his concern and now he definitely was worrying.

"What in the name of Suzaku happened to you?" his eye was searching my body for any other signs of abuse; he grabbed my wrist gently bringing them closer and inspecting them.

"It's nothing, don't worry about it," I said pulling away from him.

"Show me. Let me see if your okay then" It was all he said but for some reason I had to comply. I loosened the sash of my blue robe. The silky fabric was the only thing I could bear to have touch my abused back. All the other fabrics had rough threads that clumped and fused to the wounds that were still slowing oozing blood. Gathering my long hair over one shoulder, I moved towards the bed. Despite my usual modesty; I started to slide my robe off my shoulders. There was no way Chichiri could see my tender back without the garment pooled at my waist.

I could hear his sharp intake of breath when he saw my back.

"Who did this to you Kouran?" He asked he sounded really upset and his fingers began to lightly trace over the lesser wounds on my back.

"Nakago, I found out who killed my parents and when I tried killing him, let's just say he wasn't pleased." I finished, putting my head down almost in shame this wasn't how I pictured this going and I was getting further away from why I was here in the first place then I felt Chichiri lean over and begin placing small kisses on the uninjured parts of my back and neck.

"It's okay Kouran, I am so sorry you had to go through this, but you're going to be okay," he said in between kisses it felt amazing and for a moment it was all I was thinking about.

"You can't win, please just leave and save your lives," I pleaded with him he had to understand. What happened next I never expected. Chichiri gently grasped my shoulders and turned me toward him, disregarding my nudity. He gazed steadily at me-he couldn't resist a glance at **all** of me, though his eye returned to my face.

"Kouran have you ever done something because you wanted to you're always making the choices for others but have you ever done something strictly because you wanted to do it? Your one of the most selfless people I'd ever met no da. Your controlled by what you think you need to do to save others but not the things that make you the happiest." He said running his hand down my arm tenderly. I let myself fall against his chest not caring about there being no clothing between us nore realizing until we touched how soft his skin felt against mine. If I was going to do something I wanted to now would be a good time. Pulling away ever so slightly, I lifted my face to Chichiri's and lightly brushed his scar with my lips, His response was to bring his lips to mine. Soon we were kissing fiercely and he was kissing me back with more passion then should have been possible for a monk. Breaking the kiss for a moment he pulled me gently on top of him, laying me across his chest. Kissing like we were each others last breath of air, his hands roamed my body. For once both of our walls were crashing down and we could explore each other in the darkness of his tent. I touched him in ways I'd only dreamed about and he touched me back with every part of him his mouth, his hands and his body. We didn't speak, we didn't need to I knew him and what he wanted to say, I love you, I need you. As if our being close to one another could release us from all the pain in our past. For hours we kissed and held each other, but there wasn't enough time and with more strength then I ever thought I would posses, I pulled away from him.

"I should go.." As I looked at him breathless and panting, in the dim light of the tent, he'd never looked more vulnerable or more beautiful to me in that moment, I wanted to stay by his side forever.

"Don't, not yet," it was all he said but I knew he meant more. That he would give up everything to be with me in that moment all his training as a monk would be thrown out the window if it wasn't already compromised by what we were just doing.

"I can't if I'm caught... well you know what it would mean, look please just be careful and I will try to do what I can to help you." I leaned down to kiss him once more and picked up my robe. Before he could say anything else I was back into a wolf and gone.

Breaking into a run, I ran though the forest, Chichiri words would give me no peace as they played in my head, over and over again. I would do all that I could for him, I knew that now. I began thinking about everything I'd done in my life, starting with what my parents wanted, the training. Did I even like fighting? I mean I was skilled at it and normally it was something I did very well, but was it even me? It was now but at the beginning it wasn't what I really wanted. I wanted to play with my friends and wear pretty dresses. I was never one to argue with my father so I did what he wished. Next was joining the army which I did because I really had no choice. Also leaving with Chichiri to go to Konan, I had to admit to myself at the time, I was really not going for myself as much as Suta, though she would have killed me had she known. She hated being led around by what was best for her. Also when I left to join these warriors I did it because I had no choice.. it seems I am always being pushed around by destiny and Chichiri's words were never more correct. I had never done anything for myself. I made up my mind in that moment what I would do to protect everyone and when all was said and done at least it was my choice.

Thinking of Chichiri and what little moments we shared last night was too much, and far too painful my heart felt as if it was being squeezed by a vice, I been in consistent amount of pain ever since I'd left him, sure that Koduko tea Soi made helped but it never dulled the pain permanently. Now I know why, I was in love with him, more so then I'd ever thought possible and I would do anything for him.

Getting back to the place, I had little time to act like I was sleeping before the servants came in to lead me to the Purification bath that all the warriors must go though before a summoning. After the surprisingly luxurious bath. I was dressed in finest summoning robes, a sleeveless dress with a golden yellow top that went into a sheer silk teal green skirt that fell to the floor like waves in a ocean, underneath was a darker green skirt and it was tied on with a golden ribbon around my waste. I wore a matching see though robe that covered the whole dress, it was embroidered with gold thread in my celestial symbol. I had my hair done up in my usual looped buns, but this time they had golden chains and white Jasmine flowers adorning them. My make up was even done in the blues from Seriyuu and my pale eyes stood out from the beautiful dress.

All the warriors, were dressed in their finest and I met Soi outside the Temple into Seriyuu's Shine, as we were about to go in I heard screaming and the sounds of a battle going on nearby. Soi and I ran off to see what was going on.

Once I got to the second hallway, I was shocked by what I saw before me, the Suzaku warriors were in a full battle with our warriors. Chichiri was there fighting as was Suta and Tasuki. Suta took one look at me dressed in my finest, and broke into a run for me, luckily I had my sword still strapped to my back. I didn't have time for this.

"Kouran there you are trader!" Suta took one swing at me but I ducked. She was so angry I don't think I'd ever seen her so made before. I kept blocking and dodging her every move.

"Why and the hell wont you fight back you bitch!" Suta screamed Slashing at me with more force than necessary. Yeah she was mad but she wasn't going to win like this.

However this was getting me nowhere, my original plan was to assassinate that damn emperor at least with him out of the way. I could see about fixing other things I'd turn into a wolf and BAM he's be lunch.. ew well not really lunch that's just gross. I can't do anything fighting Suta and even though she might really want to hurt me, she isn't doing much more then swinging her sword around and showing me every move she makes before she makes it.

"Suta stop, you have no idea what's going on?" I said trying to reason with her it may be a long shot but it was the only one I had.

"Yeah I know how you left me to join these bastards, wanted the power didn't you Kouran? More then you wanted to be friends with me?" She finished this by coming at me so hard I had to roll away. Doing this in a dress is not my idea of fun god's I still hated these things.

Finally I was able to get around Suta, coming at her from behind I held my sword to her throat, she was stunned and looked up at me with wide eyes, and she knew she was defeated

"Look you don't understand and right now I don't.." I cut myself off when I heard chanting it was Chichiri's voice when I looked away he was to my horror fighting Nakago. Oh no whipping my head and turning away from Suta completely I grabbed my sword and let her go. I began to watch the fight between them with bated breath. Please don't let him die I prayed to anyone who would listen. I began to make my way closer to them Suta got tangled up in a battle with a palace guard so I was able to get away cleanly.

Watching as if in slow motion I saw Nakago pull out his sword and lunge at Chichiri he missed but faster than I could blink I turned into a wolf and ran the few feet to where they were fighting. Turning back into a human, I watched Nakago do a move with his sword that allowed him to never lose, I jumped in front of Chichiri so fast I'd hardly knew I moved at all.

"NO" I said but it was useless as his sword went right into my chest white hot pain spreading though my body in a instant and spilling bright red blood all over my nice new dress, turning it crimson in seconds.

"KOURAN! NOO!" Chichiri grabbed me as soon as I was hit. He chanted something and threw the biggest Chi Blast I'd ever seen at Nakago knocking him back and allowing Tamahome time to fight him.

He laid me down on the cold stone floor, and hovered over me, his face was anguish and pain like I'd never seen in my life.

"Kouran, why.. why would you do that for me?" Chichiri asked his voice shattering, his tears hit my face I was struggling to breathe through a steady flow of blood was pooling in the back of my throat. I could feel that I had moments of life left, somewhere in the background I could hear screaming of my name.

"I finally did something just for me, I saved you," I whispered to him, my voice was almost gone and blood ran in rivers out of my mouth and down my neck, with my last bit a strength. I grabbed at my necklace that I still wore ever since I'd pulled it from my mother's dead body. I wanted him to have it, it being the only thing in the world I had left to give him "please hold on to this for me.. I will look for you in another life." I vowed, the feeling of my chest being ripped open didn't come close to the pain that this was the last time, I'd ever see Chichiri's face or have him touch me again. I wanted to scream at the unfairness of life but I just watched Chichiri fall apart before my eyes his body was heaving now with sobs and he was trying to tell me something.

"But I never got to tell you... I mean I never got to.." He was shaking with heaving sobs and he was having trouble speaking but I could tell what he wanted to tell me there didn't need to be words between us it was always unspoken anyway.

"I know," I gasped, that was all I ever got out if I had wanted to say more I never got the chance because I stopped breathing in the next moment, the blood filled my lungs and after a few seconds of panic I died.

Okay its done finally, I know it's a depressing ending but done worry its not over YET! I have a sequel in the works. Please Review I been working on this so long I'd LOVE to know what you all think. You have my word I will respond to every single one!


	8. Chapter 8 a new story unfolds

Complications of Gods and Warriors

This will be the rest of Kouran's story also, I will be doing Points of View so we can find out what is going on in Chichiri's head.

Authors note Sorry its been forever since an update truth is I wasn't sure any one even read this or would care if I updated at all but Kouran's story just isn't over. It might be a long time before another update unless you guys tell me you want more?

I awoke in what felt like moments later gasping for air because the last conscious memory, I had was choking on my own blood. I was only sorry Chichiri had to witness me die that way. I sat up surprisingly without a huge hole in my chest I noticed a few things, one I was in a beautiful room that was more amazing then anything I'd ever seen before gold walls, and a four poster bed sat in the great room with carved post representing the four gods. Before I could even leave or realize what the hell was going on? The huge doors opened and in walked the most beautiful women I'd ever seen. She was dressed in a pale pink robe with a ribbon that seemed to float around her, and her hair was light pink with strands of sliver that made it shine in the light.

"Who are you? What's going on? Why am I here" I asked

"I am Titskune, this is Mount Tiyoko." she said coming into the room and sitting on the edge of my bed.

"You, have been very busy Kouran, joining the other side, falling in love and dying to save Chichiri. I say that's pretty extraordinary." She smiled and went on "but so amazing of a life shouldn't be so quickly ended. Actually that's not how the fates wanted this to go at all." She placed a hand on my shoulder. "How this ends is up to you and you alone."

"What do you mean? Who are you some kind of Goddess?" I asked her.

"Do I Look like a Goddess to you?" She responded as if she didn't know how beautiful she really was.

"Well yes of course your beautiful.." I stated it was a fact after all.

"You can see my true self, that's quite shocking not many can, not even Chichiri's powers are strong enough to see my true form, most see myself as an old hag, I believe this means your going to do really well at the challenge ahead." She said smiling.

"Okay, Wait? What?" I was totally confused.

"Kouran remember when you and Suta were unable to kill Chichiri and Tasuki when you first met them, do you know why that is?" My response to this was a clueless look. "It's because of fate, your fated to love him as you were fated to join him, your brother wasn't suppose to die and you were going to have a happy ending. However, Nakago wanted to take over all the worlds even Miaka's the battle went to her world shortly after you died, Yui summoned Seriyuu and he was to devour her, but Miaka summoned Suzaku and was able to save everyone. Their back in there world now and Tamahome been reborn there. Don't worry Chichiri, Tasuki and Suta are in this world alive and well. Which is where you come in Kouran, I feel the need to give you a second chance the Gods relics of power need to be gathered from the priestesses guarding them at there temples. Because all the God's have been summoned and it is time to reunite their powers and the universe as well. Our world stands divided its time for us to stand together as one. Most people are going to try to stop this as in their hate they are opposed to a united world but we need to end these wars and fighting. I was hoping you would be the beacon of peace in this world and help me by bringing the power together and uniting our world. Only problem is no one alive, can hold that much power. A special body or vassal needs to be created to house the powers temporarily until you can bring the power to my realm. Where I can use them with the God's help to bring lasting peace to this world. I can give you a temporary body to do this it's going to be difficult and dangerous . So Kouran, I will give you something in return if you can prove to me that you are worthy. I know right now there is only one thing you want in this world, but you can't have him unless he is worthy as well, so if you can get Chichiri to love you in any form under any circumstances then and only then will I give you a second chance at a life you were denied. Of course I will ask Chichiri , Tasuki and even Suta to accompany you on this journey so that you will not be alone and will have time with Chichiri. So do we have a deal then?" She looked at me her kind face was full of understanding as she waited for my answer.

I'll admit it was a lot to take in a hell of a lot but again I didn't have a whole lot of choices in this matter either.

"I'd get to see him again?" I asked tears clouding up my eyes, "I never thought I would get to see him again of course. I will do anything just to see him again. What happens if I can't get him to love me? I asked fearing the answer but knowing without a doubt I crawl though the deepest pits of hell if it meant I'd have a chance at a happy life with him.

"You will go to the afterlife or you will be reborn, in short you die again. Right now your soul is here because of my powers, I watched and brought you here once you left your physical body your only corporal because I am giving you a temporary body to use. She explained.

"Okay I will do it, Gladly" I said. I would do anything she asked in that moment if it meant seeing Chichiri again.

She let out a chuckle" My you do surprise me Kouran, so quick to make your choice but I am glad you decided to help. Okay and because your taking this so gracefully, I will help you out by making you so beautiful even Chichiri wont be able to stop from looking at you." She laughed maybe she knew this was going to be as hard as I did. Then she turned and looked at me. "Are you ready my child?" She asked me taking my hand and pulling me from the bed. I felt her power enter me it was warm like sunshine and when I looked down my body was different.

"Look at yourself Kouran, or as I shall now call you Kerian Guardian of the Four Gods" She led me to a mirror as I looked at myself my breath caught, the first thing I noticed were my eyes, they were the Yellow of Suzaku's surrounded by red make up on my lids, My hair was long down past my waste and sliver, it caught the light of the room and reelected the colors of the room in it. I was wearing a red dress with gold across the front, a red robe with gold lining went over the dress and tied with a black and gold ribbon, tied on both sides and hanging down were gold coins. A gold necklace phoenix holding 4 stones was around my neck and I had on a head piece of gold chains with rubies hanging off the ends. I was built the same way only a bit smaller than before.

"wow," it was all I was able to say.

"Yes now right now your dressed for Suzaku because that's who you will visit first. I have other costumes for the respective God's you will have to wear when your in there temples playing favorites to the God's wont go over well with the Priestesses as they have spent most of their lives serving their Gods.

"I will go to the others and invite their help on this quest and you will be reunited with them soon. It has been 3 months since you died, so they will still be healing, In the mean time you will rest and revive also you need some training on the new powers. Okay, I will return shortly." with that she left.

I still looked at myself in the mirror shocked and not able to believe it. Titskune was right I looked amazing, still it probably wouldn't be enough to win Chichiri's affections he was probably devastated over me. How could I win back me from me? This was confusing. Finally after way over thinking things I finally fell asleep on the soft huge bed.

Note: Sorry so short guys I been working hard to finish! Please let me know if anyone is still reading this at all? If so I will post some more chapters thanks for reading! Reviews are love!


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